NY Mirror

Another old-fashioned potboiler, Emlyn Williams's Night Must Fall is an edge-of-your-seater which will probably fill the seats when Tony Randall's National Actors Theatre puts it on later this season, if things go according to plan. The production's main draw is that, as Randall's been telling my sources, Matthew Broderick will most likely star as the baby-faced killer, fresh off playing oppositea monster in Godzilla. Now that was a mustache.

And I have some other killer casting news. Cable TV stripper-comic Sandy Kane just landed a cameo in the Bette Midler flick Isn't She Great?and winsomely notes, "Bette and me--that's two great pairs of titties!" But Goldie Hawn might have to star in Isn't She Bitter? I hear the folks behind the movie of Chicago--that rollicking musical about lusty lady killers--are having second thoughts about using Goldie as Madonna's costar, so they're trying to make it hard for her to stick with the project (but she'd betterbe in Chicago, folks, or I'm going back to Boston). And, over in L.A., people started pegging Jennifer Tilly as a ladykiller when she came with a woman to the closing of the gay film fest, prompting all sorts of hopeful speculation--but I've gone to things with women and believe me, honey, it doesn't mean anything.

While we're speculating, can we please lose all those rather contrived charts (you know, "20 Ways That Elaine's Is Similar to Saving Private Ryan")that now substitute for editorial in so many magazines? And if models have really peaked as a life form, can we finally stop celebrating their presence at parties as if their having been born with fingers long enough to vomit with somehow makes them esteemed company? And finally, can a crane kindly disrupt those draconian (as opposed to Bostonian) coppers in Times Square, one of whom recently stopped me on my bike and said, "Slow down! If you hit a tourist, you're gong to jail!"? Oh,I presume running down a native would be just fine, however.

Michael Musto can be e-mailed at musto@villagevoice.com.

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