NY Mirror

Grace Jones appeared in rainbow-colored wings to address us as 'my subjects' while Lee Majors danced wildly with the ballsy puppets.

Just then— it's not over— the entire front of the hotel erupted in fireworks, sparks shooting off the terraces as we thanked God we hadn't stayed in our rooms. The second it was over— as if Sol himself had some arrangement with the Lord— the expected rain started and everyone ran inside to watch the Junkanoo Parade of guys in feathered headdresses bumping their pelvises as a brass band played a reggae version of "I'll Be There." Star Jones was gushing that she'd been to all sorts of events, "but this shit is really fabulous!" Even the Donald told me he liked what they'd done with the place— and he used to own it! The only mildly perturbed person was Julianne Moore, whom I told to keep her baby away from Jacko.

In New York, it took weeks to recover from the glittering food and frenzy, but some sobering experiences helped. From the luxury towers of Atlantis, I went right to The Prince of Egypt, which could have used some rotisseries and Bahamian specialties. The dud movie is alternately ponderous and unpleasant, and though The View's Debbie Matenopolous seemed to be somewhat impressed by it, she told me, "Taking a kid to that would be like taking them to see The Shining!"

Queens of Mesopotamia are the stars of Paul Rudnick's The Most Fabulous Story Ever Told,though the second half— a lively Christmas party in modern-day Chelsea— works far better than the biblical takeoff in Act One, which transports Rudnick's somewhat moldy spoofs of gays as potential decorators with hair-care and crudité fixations to the beginning of time.

Viva Las Vegas: the shrimp cocktail special at Atlantis
Patrick Mcmullan
Viva Las Vegas: the shrimp cocktail special at Atlantis

There are half as many exposed penises in The Blue Room, but the one is quite golden-flying-horsey enough, thank you. A friend of mine joked that the show has given Tom Cruise his first chance to see Nicole Kidman naked— but that is not true and THEY ARE NOT GAY, OK? In any case, this Room is a provocative one to check into— it's a slight, but enticing romp with so much sex appeal that the night I saw it, people were streaming out of the theater in impassioned lip locks. If they could only bottle this stuff, we wouldn't need to get quite so excited about puppets.

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