A Little on the Side

Violet, 42, MerrickI met this guy online. We spent hours on the Internet and on the phone talking to each other. We met in person. He was a very playful little kitty cat. We spent more time together. Then I looked up his screen name at his Web server just to do a little research, to see if there was anything on him, like a profile. And what do I find but a personal ad in which he mentions that he's engaged and "happily living with his fiancée" in Manhattan. Needless to say the first phone call that I made was to his apartment in Manhattan. When he heard my voice on the phone he kept saying, "Hello, hello, hello" like there was no one on the line. I called again and got his answering machine and screeched, "What do you mean, you little fuck, 'I'm happily engaged living with my fiancée.' " I didn't say any more except that I had an appointment with my doctor for a pregnancy test. Then next day he called me up hysterical, telling me that I had ruined his relationship and his engagement was off. Can't wait to see what happens when I tell him that the rabbit died.

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