By Jared Chausow
By Katie Toth
By Elizabeth Flock
By Albert Samaha
By Anna Merlan
By Jon Campbell
By Jon Campbell
By Albert Samaha
But otherwise, I simply adore parties and will continue to attend them and even write about them through eternity. After all, parties and I inexorably belong to each otherand all the other dingbats, bores, and crashers.
And so: David Geffen was just at Pork, the night they had a spanking demonstration. I wasn't there, mind you, but only because I have a home tutor. . . . Endearing jazz singer Peggy Cone got a bit of a public spanking at a party fashion doyenne Eleanor Lambert had recently. The Times just ran a picture of Peggy and Eleanor schmoozing it up at the bash, but what the caption didn't say was that Lambert later realized Cone wasn't invited and asked her to kindly exit. And it was a full buffet!
The party for the thought-provoking political drama The Contender wasn't punishing, and not just because I wasn't thrown out on my ass. It was inspiring to note that writer-director Rod Lurie used to be a film critic, a fact that has every press dreg on both coasts digging their screenplays out of mothballs for one last marketing push. The movie's most indelible image has Gary Oldman sporting weird sprouts of hair as the McCarthyesque bad guy. "He created the whole look himself," Lurie told me at the premiere. "He had an official hair plucker." I'm starting to need one for my nose and ears.
Pubic hair ran wild at the bash for Robert Altman's Dr. T & the Women, which is highly enjoyable, despite the absurdity of its assigning romantic overtones to gynecology. (Oh yeah, shove that speculum way up there, you hot babe!) Kate Hudson just told me for Out magazine that the Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders rescinded their uniform when they realized her character dykes out. What cowgirls! But at the party, everyone was dressed up and fancy-free, with Liv Tyler's mother, Bebe Buell, asking me, "How did you like my daughter as a lesbian?" "She got it from you," I cracked. "Oh, please!" exclaimed Buell. "When did I ever date women? She got it from her father, dear."
I got it from the grapevine that Will & Grace's hot mama Megan Mullally just shot an Old Navy holiday commercialand, even better, she wasn't union-busting by doing so; the advertiser signed a strike interim deal. Carrie Donovan, however, scabbed before the deal was made, and is now being unfashionably called up on union charges! Show her the exit, Ms. Lambert.
Brimming with will and grace, I ran into director Joel Schumacher on a bench outside a bagel store in the Village and realized that not all parties have to be indoors. Between bites of low-fat cream cheese, Joel said he'd been asked to do the Queer as Folk pilot for Showtime, but it didn't work out because he was busy finishing up Tigerland (a/k/a Straight as Folk). I told him that what Showtime ended up with sounds dirty and racy enough, but Joel said, "It seemed dirty and racy for the sake of itnot character driven. I told them, 'Why not just show the British version?' Remember when they were going to do an American version of Absolutely Fabulous? Why bother?" How true, sweetie, darling, especially since, a bunch of years later, the Brit episodes are still running!