NY Mirror

But can we put that on hold for just le minute? More pressing was the chance to check out the state of American theater with Starmites 2001, the Off-Broadway revisal of the 1989 Broadway musical that became famous as a giant flop that somehow nabbed six Tony nominations. The millions of people who missed the culty comic-book pastiche the first time around have been desperate to catch the new version in order to restore their theater-queen credentials. The verdict? It still feels inconsequential and a bit lame, though it's generally good-natured, well sung, and even has a new Napster joke. But don't ask me—I'm not a sociologist.

That other sci-fi toe-tapper, Bat Boy: The Musical, is feisty but rather bloodless, though at the opening night party at the W last week, guests like Monica Lewinskyand Woody Allen(separate) definitely brought my fangs out. I asked Woody if he was there because it's a scandal show and he's a scandal star. No, he said, "I'm a friend of Jean Doumanian[his—and Bat Boy's—producer]. I had to speak against the building of a building tonight, but I'll see the show this weekend." Building a kinship with moi, actress J. Smith-Cameronmurmured, "When Woody squints in the paparazzi's glare, he looks a little like Bat Boy." Her equally esteemed hubby, You Can Count On Me author Kenneth Lonergan, admitted he wasn't worried about Gladiator as a screenplay competitor for the Oscar (alas, they both lost) and also advised me on how to watch the awards show: "Throw balled socks at the screen when there's a moment you don't like." Honey, there aren't that many socks in the world!

musto@villagevoice.com