By Steve Weinstein
By Devon Maloney
By Tessa Stuart
By Alison Flowers
By Albert Samaha
By Jesse Jarnow
By Eric Tsetsi
By Raillan Brooks
SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21)
According to my reading of the astrological omens, this would be a perfect time for you to declare a general amnesty regarding all matters affecting your closest relationships. Have you been nursing secret grudges forever? Dissolve them. Are you keeping a tally about how much more (or less) you give to your partners than they offer you? Wipe the slate clean. Have you been rigidly holding on to expectations that they will never be able to change? Relax your death-grip. Now murmur the following affirmation a few hundred times: "We are free to reinvent the way we are together!"
CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19)
Businessman Dennis Tito paid the Russians to let him join their astronauts on a trip to the International Space Station. U.S. officials were peeved. NASA administrator Daniel Goldin raged that it would be a "cold day in hell" before his agency would welcome "tourists" like Tito. In other words, his taxpayer-supported old boys' club wants a monopoly on deciding who gets the great privilege of seeing our planet from space. My feeling is that we should send poets and artists and spiritual leaders up thereimaginative and articulate people who can report back to us on what it's like to be transformed by this rare experience. I mention this, Capricorn, because I'd like you to try an analogous shift. Use the dreamy, visionary aspects of your psyche to survey all the scenes that are normally managed by your logical, organized mind.
AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18)
In her poetic treatise A Natural History of the Senses, Diane Ackerman notes that human lips, tongues, and genitals all benefit from the presence of ultrasensitive neural receptors called Krause's end bulbs. That's why our bodies experience the greatest pleasure there. According to my astrological analyses your personal complement of these magic buttons is even more supercharged than usual. Your psyche itself is now brimming with the fully turned-on spiritual equivalent of Krause's end bulbs.
The Televisionary Oracle
A Novel by Rob Brezsny
A lusty but sensitive rock star encounters the leader of a goddess - worshiping religious order that values pranks as much as prayers.
Check out Rob's band World Entertainment War.
Want to know more about Rob, or look up past horoscopes? Visit freewillastrology.com.
You can contact Rob at firstname.lastname@example.org.
PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20)
"Dear Mr. Know-It-All: In one of your horoscopes you said the best way to solve any problem is to tune in to the 'still, small voice' of my 'inner teacher.' I gave it a whirl. I really did. But frankly, after much trying, I didn't hear a goddamn thing. Were you just spouting some meaningless New Age crap? Pissed-Off Pisces" Dear Pissed: It's hard to detect the still, small voice when your brain is aswarm with the caterwaul of complaining and cursing, as yours seems to be. Likewise, the voice never tries to scream above the din of your out-of-control inner monologues. Its clear tones arise amid emptiness and calm. Another tip: It neither hates nor judges nor flatters. So try again, please. Current astrological omens are such that you'll have an easier time being reverent and objective.
What's the single most important question you have to find an answer for in the next five years? Deliver your best guess to me at www.freewillastrology.com.