By Albert Samaha
By Steve Weinstein
By Devon Maloney
By Tessa Stuart
By Alison Flowers
By Albert Samaha
By Jesse Jarnow
By Eric Tsetsi
SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21)
Forget self-help books, hypnosis, 12-step programs, affirmations, and brazen pleas to God. For a limited time only, and for you Sagittarians alone, there's only one strategy that can precipitate a true cure, and that's to transmute a dark secret in your past into a useful and inspiring asset. It may take more than a New York minute, or even longer than a Guadalajara week. But sooner or later, if you're faithful to this healing project, you'll stop being unconsciously or "accidentally" mean to yourself, and you'll exorcise the subliminal pain that covertly saps your ability to claim your birthright.
CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19)
If you want to know a secret, Capricorn, you're the only sign of the zodiac that's strong enough to make good use of what I'm about to say. Not only that: The astrological omens suggest you're especially ripe to act on it. Here goes. "The secret of life," declared sculptor Henry Moore to poet Donald Hall, "is to have a task, something you devote your entire life to, something you bring everything to, every minute of the day for your whole life. And the most important thing is it must be something you cannot possibly do."
AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18)
In his book The Art of Pilgrimage, travel writer Phil Cousineau bemoans the tourists who rumble through exotic landscapes "with dull eyes and unexcited imaginations." He recalls "the cruise ships I've lectured on and passengers who never disembarked at Bali, Istanbul, Crete, or the island of Komodo, preferring to stay on board to play cards or watch old videos." Let this serve as your warning beacon in the next two weeks. As tempting as it might be to sleepwalk through the wonders that will be revealed, please stay awake with all your might.
The Televisionary Oracle
A Novel by Rob Brezsny
A lusty but sensitive rock star encounters the leader of a goddess - worshiping religious order that values pranks as much as prayers.
Check out Rob's band World Entertainment War.
Want to know more about Rob, or look up past horoscopes? Visit freewillastrology.com.
You can contact Rob at firstname.lastname@example.org.
PISCES(Feb. 19-March 20)
In the course of my life, I've been deeply in love with seven women. My mere infatuations, on the other hand, number a gaudy 35. What about you, Pisces? Please meditate on how these two types of attraction have played out for you during the past 10 years. I bring the issue to your attention because you're likely to face a major showdown between mere romantic obsession and the Real Thing in the second half of 2001. My preference is that you'll opt for the latter. It may kindle more slowly and require more hard work than you usually associate with love, but the rewards will be a hundred times more valuable than the transitory inflammations.
Homework: Pretend to be something you're not, just for fun and without doing any harm, and then report your results to email@example.com.