By Alex Distefano
By Scott Snowden
By Anna Merlan
By Steve Almond
By Jena Ardell
By Jon Campbell
By Alan Scherstuhl
By Tessa Stuart
In a more grown-up arena, the Post repeated a dubious report that Brad Pitttold Jennifer Anistonto be less gay in her career choices. But ahem, didn't he do that Wspread in which he looked like a male hustler? Besides, the same tabloid had a swooning piece about John Travolta's crushes, from Halle Berryto Olivia Newton-John. Those are mybitches, honey.
Can I now belatedly bitch out the Fox News Channel for its tireless exploitationI mean coverageof the Chandra Levy story? It's certainly provided hours of offbeat amusement that could easily play Sundays at Fez, but it's often downright absurd, with the same obvious arguments"Conditshould have been more forthcoming"repeated ad infinitum by a rotating gaggle of speculating "experts." The nadir was an interview with a shrink, who was asked, "If Chandra had come in for a visit, how would you have analyzed her?" The interviewee floundered around in search of a kernel of truth to pop. Dan Rather, maybe you were right after all.
Analyze this: Kyle Bradfordthe porn star Tom Cruisesued for saying they had an affairhas a new Web site, but though there are half-nude photos of Kyle on it, the site emphasizes his legit acting career, listing roles like "Capanchino [sic] vendor" on Days of Our Lives. Even more interestingly, the homepage says, "Hey guys . . . thanks for cruisin' by my Web site," with cruisin' in a special typeface. Oops, he did it again.
And guess what event one of beleaguered Paula Poundstone's last pre-rehab performances took place during? A fundraiser called Mother to Daughter, Friend to Friend! Hello Muddah, indeed. Oy.
Recuperating diva Mariah Carey thinks her ex-husband, music mogul Tommy Mottola, is trying to ruin her career. Is she crazy or brilliantly on target? Well, when Mariah's "Loverboy" single bombed with radio two months ago, her label, Virgin, scheduled a commercial single version of the song to come out in July at the outrageously low price of 49 cents. Just then, Sony Music, under Mottola, came out with Destiny's Child's "Bootylicious" as a commercial single (its release had been delayed twice) and priced it at 49 cents, Sony's first such-priced single in two years. Thanks to having more airplay, "Bootylicious" promptly went to number one on the Billboard Hot 100 chart and Mariah got stuck in second place. That's the exact day she went nuts and was institutionalized. Mottola's people deny any malicious intent.