By Keegan Hamilton
By Albert Samaha
By Village Voice staff
By Tessa Stuart
By Albert Samaha
By Steve Weinstein
By Devon Maloney
By Tessa Stuart
SAGITTARIUS(Nov. 22-Dec. 21):
It's the Flying and Soaring Season for you Sagittarians. There are many ways to celebrate. If you've ever fantasized about becoming a pilot, this is prime time to launch the process. Hang gliding, parasailing, and skydiving are also appropriate. Less literal approaches are just as good, too. Close your eyes and visualize yourself hovering and swooping above the treetops. Learn how to induce flying dreams with the help of Stephen Laberge's book Lucid Dreams. Or picture what the story of your life looks like when seen from on high. To get in the properly playful mood for this transcendent time, figure out your wingspan. Lie on your back with your arms outstretched and have a friend measure the distance from the tip of one middle finger to the other. Do you have the same wingspan as a hawk? Eagle? Osprey?
CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19):
It's the perfect astrological moment to upgrade your approach to kissing. Cosmic forces will benevolently conspire on your behalf if you experiment profusely. Want some suggestions to get you started? Butterfly your lips over every square inch of your lover's body with the same attention and tenderness that you usually apply to the primary erogenous zones. Make out with each other while eating ice cream and cake. Blow collaborative kisses to the sky and rivers and fields of corn. Meditate on how opening your heart wider and deeper might inspire you to develop an instinctive flair for expressing innovative soul kisses.
AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18):
Whether you're male or female or transgender, straight or gay or both, the next seven days will be Learn to Be Your Own Wife Week. And what's the best way to celebrate this turning point in your relationship with yourself? Renounce all your yearnings to be waited on and cleaned up after. Divest yourself of every last deluded wish that one day some special person will come along to magically understand and attend to your every need. Pledge that from now on you will be a connoisseur of taking care of yourself. (PS: If you earnestly undertake this heroic transformation, you just may stir up a fresh delivery of love from a non-wifely type of person.)
The Televisionary Oracle
A Novel by Rob Brezsny
A lusty but sensitive rock star encounters the leader of a goddess - worshiping religious order that values pranks as much as prayers.
Check out Rob's band World Entertainment War.
Want to know more about Rob, or look up past horoscopes? Visit freewillastrology.com.
You can contact Rob at firstname.lastname@example.org.
PISCES(Feb. 19-March 20):
"Nothing's going right in my life. I feel anxious and paranoid all the time. My relationships are a mess." In my line of work, people make confessions like that to me frequently. My first response to them is usually something like this: "Do you habitually gobble junk food near bedtime, steal a paltry five hours of sleep per night, gulp two cups of coffee and no breakfast in the morning, then bolt to a workplace where you get no sunlight or exercise and sit in an uncomfortable chair?" More than 80 percent of the time, they reply, "How did you know?!" My point is that many psychological troubles stem from our chronic failure to take good care of our physical needs. This is especially important for you to keep in mind during the coming weeks, dear Pisces.
What good old thing could you give up in order to attract a great new thing into your life? Testify at www.freewillastrology.com