By Steve Weinstein
By Devon Maloney
By Tessa Stuart
By Alison Flowers
By Albert Samaha
By Jesse Jarnow
By Eric Tsetsi
By Raillan Brooks
ARIES (March 21-April 19):
There is an infinity of possible answers to the question "What is the meaning of life?" Last week, the meaning of life for me was embodied by a drunken Zen master who came to me in a dream and drawled, "Think with your heart and feel with your head." This week brought a new answer: In a San Francisco café, I found a bar napkin on which someone had drawn a three-panel cartoon depicting a butterfly crawling into a cocoon and being transformed into a caterpillar. For you this week, Aries, the answer to "What is the meaning of life?" is an image that came to me as I meditated on your astrological omens: On a dry lake bed, a dozen long-stemmed red roses rise out of an ancient Greek vase as a thunderbolt cracks through the sky and a downpour begins.
TAURUS (April 20-May 20):
Tune in, please, to all the nagging itches that fester in the back of your mind and at the bottom of your heart. For now, do not attempt to scratch them; do not judge them; do not visualize them as frustrated desires whose purpose is to drive you mad with longing. Instead, Taurus, simply regard those nagging itches with reverence and curiosity. Give them room to breathe and allow them to speak their truths. Surrender to the fullness of the emotions they stir. It may take an hour or it may take a few days, but if you persist in this approach, the nagging itches will become your brilliant guides. They will instruct you as to what questions you most need to ask and they will show you how to move in the direction of the blessed answers.
GEMINI (May 21-June 20):
Is there anything about you that has remained unripe for too long? Have you clung to your innocence or amateur status past the time when you should have graduated to the next higher level? Are you still a dilettante in a field where you have the potential to become a flaming master? If you answered yes to any of those questions, now is a perfect moment to kick yourself in the butt. Waiting for fate to do the kicking for you would be a first-class goof-up.
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CANCER(June 21-July 22):
There are few things more poignant to an astrologer than a Crab without a secret. You Cancerians need tantalizing enigmas in order to feel fully alive. You thrive in the auras of smoldering mysteries, and you love to explore hidden treasure in private. Though at times your fascination with the adult version of peekaboo is a way to preserve your delusions, just as often it's a healthy expression of your playful nature and a wise recognition of how elusive and ever shifting the "objective truth" can be. I've described this in detail, my dears, because you are dangerously low on secrets right now. It's time to get filled up.
LEO (July 23-Aug. 22):
My acquaintance Renata is a sculptor who creates animals from marble and limestone. She likes to say that her art consists of liberating the figures that are buried inside the stone. She doesn't build a statue, then, as much as she carves away the stuff that's obscuring it. I recommend that you borrow Renata's approach, Leo. The thing you love and need and deserve already exists, whole and complete. All you have to do is eliminate the unessential elements that are keeping it unavailable to you.
VIRGO(Aug. 23-Sept. 22):
Many smart, educated people think astrology is bunk perpetrated by quacks. For any stargazer with an ego, this threatens to be depressing. We want to be loved and appreciated like everyone else. On the other hand, I've found that being in a field that gets so little respect has for the most part been liberating. It has been impossible for me to get all puffed up with overbearing pride; I've had to learn to practice astrology primarily for the joy it brings me, not as a means of seeking recognition. In a backhanded way, then, a seemingly demoralizing curse has become an invigorating boon. I predict that you, Virgo, will soon harvest an analogous mutation.
LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22):
The Real Thing has arrived. Maybe not the Ultimate, Climactic, Last-You-All-Your-Life Real Thing, but who knows? Even if it is just a temporary Real Thing, it's still got a lot of rich transformations to give you. I'd like to inquire, therefore, why you have not yet let it fully into your life? Is it because it has a superficial resemblance to a counterfeit "Real Thing" from your past? Or, in a world teeming with false promises and spin doctors and crafty sales pitches, are you finding it hard to recognize a truly genuine article? Pinch yourself, Libra.
SCORPIO(Oct. 23-Nov. 21):
You Scorpios are the most strategic sign of the zodiac. Like chess masters, you're often thinking 10 moves ahead. At the same time, your ability to concentrate on what's right in front of you is almost scarily potent; your piercing attention resembles a magnifying glass focusing the sun's rays on a bug on the sidewalk. This combination may make you difficult to read and impossible to outmaneuver: You can be intensely zeroed in on the present, yet furiously scanning the past and future for clues on how to take maximum advantage of all the possibilities. Everything I just described is currently at a peak of expression. May you use it to create abundant good works for all concerned.