NY Mirror

The worst restaurant opening last week promised Pink and Lenny Kravitz and delivered a model, relentless '80s music, and some pass-along cheeseballs. Who cares? . . . A notch above was the bash for Pedro Almodóvar at Man Ray, where a young lady cornered me to say, "Everyone wants to fuck me, and since I'm an artist, they steal my ideas, and I get fucked twice!" Richard Belzer was there too—it all comes together—telling me how chilling he thought G. Gordon Liddy was on his pilot, especially when he talked about what governments are capable of. (Oh yeah, Liddy was on the panel!)

The best recent celebrity-family sighting had one of superchef Mario Batali's kids needing to be comforted near a McDonald's, Batali explaining, "But Daddy and Mommy don't eat at places like that!" Whether it's a matter of snobbery or just plain survival I have no idea. . . . Does Hollywood ever say, "We don't go there"? Yeah, if the director wants a more lenient rating (i.e., a bigger audience). Case in point: To nab an R, I hear, the no-knickers epic The Rules of Attraction sacrificed some of the suicide footage and also the way someone's vomit spewed onto the virgin character's back. (NC must stand for "non-restricted chunks.") Alas, the movie's bombed anyway, so they got fucked twice.

The reopening Limelight has been streamlined too, though the place's name seems to be getting longer. It was going to be called Empire, then Escape, and now it's been dubbed Republic@ Limelight. That's the bizarre result of a compromise between the managers who want to preserve the Limelight name and those who want to run for their lives from it. Republic@Limelight will open late November, says promoter John Blair, who'll do a Sunday gay night there—"and I'm calling it Limelight!"

Back in the limelight, Flower Drum Songis a middle-range Rodgers and Hammerstein tuner that doesn't rate a total (moo goo gai) pan; it has too much pizzazz. But it's weird that, though the revisers have conscientiously pared away some of the racial stereotypes, they've added a selfish, nervous-Nellie Bobby Trendy type who's deemed too flaming to play a sailor at the Club Chop Suey—a plot innovation that sets gays back 20 years. Still, if it becomes a TV pilot, count me in.


musto@villagevoice.com

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