By Albert Samaha
By Steve Weinstein
By Devon Maloney
By Tessa Stuart
By Alison Flowers
By Albert Samaha
By Jesse Jarnow
By Eric Tsetsi
CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): The Museum of Make Believe features artifacts from nursery rhymes, fairy tales, and classical literature. Among its treasures are Snow White's mirror, Jack and Jill's notorious pail, the baseball mitt from The Catcher in the Rye, and the tools Geppetto used to create his wooden son, Pinocchio. I suggest you draw inspiration from this museum in the coming week, Capricorn. The astrological omens say you will have great success in translating your imaginative ideas into concrete reality. (See the MOMB's treasures at ruinedeye.com/MOMB/MAKEB.htm.)
AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): I fear that you aren't making yourself sufficiently available. The cosmos is in an increasingly generous mood toward you, but you've erected psychic barriers that are preventing the fullness of the blessings from reaching you. Here's an idea for how to shift the energy: Wrap two empty boxes in festive paper, ribbons, and bows. Place them in a prominent place in your home; on your altar if you have one. Then gaze at these packages meditatively for 10 minutes a day, visualizing what gifts you'd like to be inside and rehearsing the feeling of intense gratitude.
PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): In recent years, a tradition of guerrilla art has broken out in Chicago, New York, and Los Angeles. Seattle has become the latest beneficiary of the covert movement to beautify America with free sculptures. The Seattle Times reported that one night unknown creators swooped down on a café in a crime-ridden area, leaving behind a handcrafted table and chairs. On top of the table was a vase filled with flowers. One seat, a metal trunk that opened, contained vintage playing cards and a game. I hope this whets your appetite for benevolent pranks, Pisces. The best way to align yourself with cosmic law right now is to give unpredictable gifts to as many people as possible, even strangers.
The Televisionary Oracle
A Novel by Rob Brezsny
A lusty but sensitive rock star encounters the leader of a goddess - worshiping religious order that values pranks as much as prayers.
Check out Rob's band World Entertainment War.
Want to know more about Rob, or look up past horoscopes? Visit freewillastrology.com.
You can contact Rob at email@example.com.
Homework: Make up a secret identity for yourself, please, complete with a new name and astrological sign. beautyandtruth.com