By Steve Weinstein
By Devon Maloney
By Tessa Stuart
By Alison Flowers
By Albert Samaha
By Jesse Jarnow
By Eric Tsetsi
By Raillan Brooks
A dulcimer player's wet dream, New Tang Dynasty Television's two-day Chinese New Year gala at the Hammerstein Ballroom sounded so alluring that I was there faster than you can say "egg foo old." Unlike Taboo, the result was shocking in all of its gentle reserve. The New Year's celebrations I've known have always been filled with confetti-studded vomit and loud confessions in the night, but this one had a series of slickly produced numbers providing contemplative entertainment for a polite, lightly clapping audience. Of all the many-splendored treats, my faves were a Taiwanese college troupe's fluttery dance number to "The Prairie in My Heart" and a soprano's version of "Longing for China Proper," performed with Evita poses, smoke machine emissions, and slides of the Great Wall. Welcome to the year of the monkeyor spanking it, anyway.
Perhaps for folks longing for China poppers, I hear VH1 is doing a Totally Gay 2 special, and this time the topics might include Matt & Ben (the show), Brini Maxwell (ditto), Jonny McGovern ("the gay pimp"), and Cojo (the gay primp). In another nutty roundup, Vanity Fair just shot a group photo of Gotham nightlife impresarios past and present, from Ian Schrager and Rudolf Pieper to Amy Sacco and Erich Conrad. That's everyone who's ever given me a drink tickettrue legends!
Before I bellyache up to the bar, let me tell you that rubber-faced riot Jackie Hoffman, who stole Legally Blonde 2 in under 30 seconds, is doing The Kvetching Continues Mondays at Joe's Pub. About being in the long-running Hairspray, Jackie says, "You remember what happened to poor Roy Horn? I'm afraid Harvey Fierstein will drag me offstage that way someday."
Well, a street rat is dragging me off, so let me quickly ask: Does John Edwards seem a little gay to you? Um, er, not to me either. Now go back to Page Six!