By Alex Distefano
By Scott Snowden
By Anna Merlan
By Steve Almond
By Jena Ardell
By Jon Campbell
By Alan Scherstuhl
By Tessa Stuart
Make it 16I also chatted up the show's ROBERT GANT, asking about the legendary night LARRY KING called him straight on live TV. "Larry misunderstood the cue cards," Gant explained, "which said there were two openly gay guys. He assumed everyone else was straight." It's that damned culture of assumption! Gant later came out in The Advocate, and said he now gets oodles of e-mails from closeted actors asking if they should follow suit. "It's a small pack," Gant told me, "but it's growing. And it's very welcoming." You hear that, any number of people?
By the way, as Queer Eye's KYAN DOUGLAS walked by holding onto a hot boyfriend, Gantwho'd been linked to Douglas in the columnsdidn't even flinch. They're friends. It's called class, folks.
And now, let's all welcome my new drag nameLana Opportunity (or maybe just the grand duchess of the isle of Rikers). By any name, I'm an incredibly hot fuck. Fun!
I hear the Post's wave-making theater disher, MICHAEL RIEDEL, is being profiled for New Yor magazine. The Times should do him too, after all the scoops they've "borrowed" from him . . . In other portrait news, TIMOTHY GREENFIELD-SANDERS's upcoming photo (plus essays) book about porn stars is being made into an HBO documentary. Don't sit too close to the screen . . . MAUREEN O'HARA's memoir reveals that legendary macho director John Ford was apparently as gay as a fruitcake. No St. Patrick's Day Parade for him, if he'd lived . . . Openly everything Irish American club legend KENNY KENNY is back from his retreat to India and says, "They make eye contact there. They have so much soul. And I got fucked a lot!"
While we're on a high plane, Sly Fox is the kind of guttural farce in which an actor suddenly adds a lisp in Act II because his next line has a lot of s's in it. The show's best joke is that a naive, pious woman is played by Showgirls' ELIZABETH BERKLEY. But on opening night, Berkley proved that the wide-eyed thing is no act, earnestly telling me, "As an actor, any time you get to play different roles, it's a thrill." It took ANNE MEARA to restore a touch of crass by screaming, "Whore! You fucking whore!" Everyone within a mile turned around, but it was PATRICIA FIELD she was greeting. Lovingly.