NY Mirror

Speaking of waking up, I recently sent shock waves through the Queer as Folk fan base by writing that the show's fresh-faced RANDY HARRISON has had a writer-editor boyfriend for two years and everything's to his liking. Doodleheads who for ages had constructed a vivid fantasy that Randy was actually dating co-star GALE HAROLD didn't want to let go of their ditzy delusion and confront the butt-plain reality I was serving (which, by the way, was told to me by Randy, then confirmed by the beau). This ass-crack-for-brains gang called me a liar and/or decided the writer-editor was Satan, all while labeling themselves "fans" of Randy. They've all since been carted away to padded cells in the Onyx Hotel. Wink, wink, wink.


LITTER BOX

Blind Alley

Which former reality-show star constantly blabs about how devoted he is to his boy-friend, but when he's on the road doing college appearances, he hits on any dude who isn't nailed down? Which current reality co-star, unsurprisingly enough, has very trashy genes? (Her mom got so drunk at a party that she locked herself in a closet—and no one tried to get her out.) Which eternally thin movie goddess was seen picking one crumb off a blueberry muffin, then announcing, "That was the best blueberry muffin I ever had!"

Which politico who's always cracking down on misbehavior should look in his own backyard? (An employee is bragging that he's bilked the guy for millions by overcharging and hiring illegal help.) Which whistle-blower was allegedly ignored by the powers that be because of his "personal problems" (i.e., he's gay)? Which gossip columnist on a rampage recently tried (unsuccessfully) to get a weekly magazine to print a negative item about that other daily's more popular column? Did you know that Wigstock will probably be on again this year at Tompkins Square Park? And finally: If you're in Brazil and you want a Brazilian wax, do you just ask for a wax?

musto@villagevoice.com

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