By Jena Ardell
By Jon Campbell
By Alan Scherstuhl
By Tessa Stuart
By Roy Edroso
By Jon Campbell
By Albert Samaha
By Zachary D. Roberts
Over by the brownies, AL FRANKEN agreed that a simple oven can help unseat the government. But does he feel Bush has some half-baked idea up his sleeve to save his twitching ass? "No," said Franken. "He's got a lot of money and an apparatus behind him, but as you saw from his news conference, he hasn't a clue about anything!"
Delightfully enough, Moby's so clued in that despite being "a WASP from Connecticut," he wants Bush to crumble like an overbaked croissant. That somehow led us into a discussion of Dr. Atkins's demise, with Moby offering, "For the last few years, he was taking hundreds of supplements every day and lots of colonics, and he would supposedly poop like once a week." I'm thrilled. Sexually.
The American Museum of the Moving Image's RICHARD GERE tribute was a wonderfully giddy affair that would have made even the DALAI LAMAbust a giggle. First, SHARON STONE kept stumbling over her intro and eventually admitted, "This is why I've waited to do Broadway." (Too badshe'd be a great Squeaky Fromme.) Another presenter, LIAM NEESON, said, "Let's see if the Lasik surgery works," before misreading his lines and realizing it doesn't. And Gere was wacky too, calling out remarks from the audience ("I'm from North Syracuse") and taunting the celebs, before leaving us with a searing verbal doughnut against Dubya. (By the way, one of the clips shown was a Gere-J.LO tango from the upcoming Shall We Dance, which looked fierceway better than Gigli.)
In other exotic-dance news, TAJAthe Upper East Side Moroccan answer to AMY SACCOtold me she's looking to expand her eponymous restaurant via downtown and South Beach. As she said that, a belly dancer's gyrating hips knocked over a drink tray and no one minded at all . . . Bellying up to the talent pool, New York editor ADAM MOSS met with MAER ROSHANrecently. Learn it . . . On the straightyou heard me, straightscene, spies say Wall Street scandal guy CHRISTIAN CURRY is living in L.A. under an assumed name. I bet it's Mud.
BREAKING NEWS, 4.29.04 Watch out, Donald. IVANA TRUMP is about to announce the launch of her own reality show, called Girls on Top. More details next week.
BREAKING NEWS, 4.30.04 Web exclusive: Rumors say pop princess MANDY MOORE is being considered for a role (presumably Glinda) in Wicked. That should be a walk to remember.