NY Mirror

At a quarter to available, I wandered into a press junket to Greenport for the opening of the Harborfront Inn, the first luxury hotel on Long Island's winery-laden North Fork, belch. The idea is to bring some class to a part of the island that's not the Hamptons, and since I don't get invited to the Hamptons, I gladly went. Amazingly, the weather was chilly—we're talking about a global realignment—but the town's sweet, with kitsch stores and a carousel instead of the Hamptons' overcrowded nightclubs and ridiculously priced designer boutiques. It might make it anyway. End of whinery tour. Don't forget your galoshes.


LITTER BOX

CROUCHING TIGER, HIDDEN DRAG QUEENS

A middle-sex (or actually cross-dressing) geisha is one of the treats in the upcoming samurai chozzerai The Blind Swordsman: Zat-oichi, but even more eyes will be on Yokohama hottie TADANOBU ASANO as a sword-carrying sourpuss. At the film's Japan Society premiere, I asked Asano—who flacks have pegged as Japan's JOHNNY DEPP—if he'd ever go Hollywood. "Of course there is no reason to refuse if such interest occurs," he said, politely, "but I don't want to forget my roots." Neither, I'm quite sure, would the gorgeously coiffed drag queen.

Downtown, the middle sex ruled at the 10th-anniversary bash of the glam-drag-rock event Squeezebox at Don Hill's, where, I hear, BOY GEORGE and the TOILET BOYS' MISS GUY un-corked their new Bowie-esque tune called "Stay Away From Pretty Boys," and even more beautifully, KATE MOSS came with new beau JOHNNY KNOXVILLE—a true collision of Obsession meets Jackass. Alas, COURTNEY LOVE couldn't be roused to make it and CHRISSIE HYNDE reportedly looked in, decided there was no air, and went home. But SEAN LENNON showed and sang along to rock vet JAYNE COUNTY's songs. "I'm glad to see he has such bad taste," exults County.


musto@villagevoice.com

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