By Albert Samaha
By Steve Weinstein
By Devon Maloney
By Tessa Stuart
By Alison Flowers
By Albert Samaha
By Jesse Jarnow
By Eric Tsetsi
CAPRICORN(Dec. 22-Jan. 19): In my mind, there are no ambiguities about your immediate future. Here are the three precise formulas that sum up all you need to know for now. (1) If you clean out the stultifying chaos in your closet, your garage, or your mind, you will set in motion events that will ultimately bring you in contact with fertile, delightful chaos. (2) As soon as you dispense with once useful stuff you don't need any more, you will be delivered from a supposedly "necessary" evil. (3) If you cut down on your use of careless language and tame your reflex to judge people harshly, you will be given the key to a treasure you didn't even know existed.
AQUARIUS(Jan. 20-Feb. 18): To the Sioux, storms that replenish the earth with heavy rain are Thunder Beings. The Mayan god of fertility and agriculture is the beneficent Chaac, who demonstrates his friendship for humans by sending them thunder and rain. For the Algonquins, Michabo is the creator of the earth and the human race. He is also master of the thunder and wind. Tawhiki is the Polynesian god of thunder and lightning, as well as the provider of good health and he who bestows the skill of building fine houses. I believe that in the coming week, Aquarius, you will have the chance to be in intimate communion with a thunder god or goddess who has much in common with these deities.
PISCES(Feb. 19-March 20): For a decade I've enjoyed observing the growing cycle of the persimmon tree in my front yard. Its new leaves bud in February, but its fruits aren't ready to eat until December. This July there was an event I've never seen in previous years. A branch became so heavy with ripening persimmons that it broke off and fell to the ground. While it was sad to me at the time, I now notice that the persimmons on the remaining branches are bigger than they usually are in September. I expect that around Christmas time, I may see fewer blooms than in previous years, but they'll be of record-breaking size. The entire scenario I just described is an apt metaphor for your year, Pisces. Whatever you lost a couple of months ago will result in you getting fewer but bigger rewards by the end of 2004.
The Televisionary Oracle
A Novel by Rob Brezsny
A lusty but sensitive rock star encounters the leader of a goddess - worshiping religious order that values pranks as much as prayers.
Check out Rob's band World Entertainment War.
Want to know more about Rob, or look up past horoscopes? Visit freewillastrology.com.
You can contact Rob at firstname.lastname@example.org.
Free Will Astrology: May 2-May 8, 2012
HOMEWORK:We all worship something, whether or not we believe in God or the gods. What idea, person, thing, or emotion do you bow down to? Testify at