No Fun in Hell With Keanu, But Racing Sim Achieves Perfection

"Smile pretty, you vain prick." So begins this horror shooting game based on a predictable movie starring a snarling Keanu Reaves (which is based on a comic book from DC/Vertigo). The wonderfully gross part about CONSTANTINE is getting to go to hell, which is chock-full of odd demons like the Bastados, two ugly, dying former humans fused into one who can pump you full of green hellfire. And, hey, I'm Keanu Reaves, who my girlfriends always wanted me to be, trying to protect the world from chaos. Yet it's the gameplay that bogs down Constantine. There's not much that's new here to challenge the senses—not the puzzles, not the way you kill the demons. Devilish fun it's not.

Why would a Manhattanite care about a racing simulation game? New Yorkers don't race. Sure, you've seen intoxicated idiots go at 100 mph on the FDR, but generally we don't really speed that much. For me, playing racing-sim games is tougher than any such drunken pedal-to-the-metal antics, like threading a microscopic needle with the naked eye. That's the challenge, the allure. GRAN TURISMO 4 may be the best sports game ever coded for the PS2, full of staggering detail right down to the folks who stand by the side of the road to cheer you on. Here, you have to get a racing license before you start your B Spec car racing career, and even that's a maddening venture. There's also the most eclectic soundtrack ever to hit a game — Bach to Van Halen to Jet. Even though I don't usually like racing games, this is 700 cars of fun and worth buying just to take a test drive in the latest Prius before you buy the real thing, or to drive the Ford Model T. The people who made this game are true craftsmen, like master diamond cutters; they got almost everything right. If only the cars would take damage when they got hit, it'd be perfect.

Check out reviews of all the latest and greatest games (updated every week), along with past faves in NYC Guide.

Details

CONSTANTINE
For: PS2, Xbox
Publisher: THQ
Developer: Bits Studios

GRAN TURISMO 4
For: PS2
Publisher: SCEA
Developer: Polyphony Digital

  • Check out reviews of all the latest and greatest games (updated every week), along with past faves in NYC Guide.
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