The Sex Lives of Comedians

Do comics do it better? An inside look at the laughter-to-orgasm ratio

Crews has one crucial bit of advice for those looking for hot comic sex: Be secure in your hotness. "If you're in a room full of comedians, chances are you are one, maybe two, degrees away from anyone your comedian lover has either fucked or made out with," she says. "They're an incestuous bunch."

So do comedians do it better? Stand-up comic Jess Wood thinks so. She's dated plenty of comics, including current boyfriend Charlie Gaeta. Wood says, "It's hard not to giggle a lot before, during, and after we've sexed up"—especially since she calls her clit "the dolphin." Funny guys definitely have the upper hand with her. "The comics I've fucked have been amazing, because they've all been filled with angst and venom," she says. "I never pick the 'nice guy' comic. I go for the guys who grab their dicks onstage and talk about how much they love to eat pussy."

I may never know firsthand whether comics make better lovers. Most of my comedian friends have warned me away from their own kind. "We're insecure, neurotic, and fucked-up," they protest. OK, fine—but don't they know that's exactly what I'm looking for?

Kambri Crews and Christian Finnegan are ready for their close-up.
photo: Ophira
Kambri Crews and Christian Finnegan are ready for their close-up.

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