AVN Adult Expo, Day Three

Saturday is undeniably the craziest day of the convention. At noon, fans are let in, and the fan line was literally miles long. I saw at least a dozen men in wheelchairs, and one with an oxygen tank—these guys are serious about meeting their favorite starlets. Being an observer to the mayhem is amusing yet strangely isolating, so I decided to head to the press room for some camaraderie with my fellow journalists. There, I met one of my favorite porn writers, Gram Ponante, whose blog I follow diligently. As someone who has worked for Adult Video News and covered the industry for many years, he is poised to offer some of the most insightful commentary on this year's show. "We have such a small, incestuous little group," he said, "So it isn't until the big prom [this convention] when we get to see where the money is coming from to support this squalid lifestyle. The enemy is us!" We chatted further over lunch with alt porn director Eon McKai and his posse of alterna-kids. Everyone agreed that performers worked harder than anyone at these shows, signing autographs, posing for pictures, and being cheery for six-hour shifts. Shane's World created my favorite booth, which had a full size working hot tub where girls got to frolic and splash as they signed autographs. My only question: how are they gonna drain the thing? (Says Gram: "I think they are selling the water to fans.") There were only a handful of male performers who were signing at booths (and I hope we'll see more in the future). I spotted Kurt Lockwood, Lexington Steele, Rob Rotten, and Evan Stone—who a fan stopped on the convention floor than swooned over as he bent down to give her his John Hancock.

The 2006 AVN Awards show was pretty uneventful, a somewhat remarkable feat for a six hour event. Fleshbot.com editor Jonno and I hit the red carpet together to compile our annual Best and Worst Dressed list, which will be online in a few days. There were few surprises when it came to the trophy-getting since Pirates, the star-studded special effects fest from Digital Playground and Adam and Eve, blew away nearly all other productions this year. It cleaned up with eleven awards and Vivid's The Devil in Miss Jones got nine. I concocted my own awards to keep things interesting for you:

I Love Open Relationships Award: In accepting her award for Best Threeway Sex Scene, Tyla Winn thanked her boyfriend—and he wasn't even one of the guys in the threesome.

Damn She Looks Amazing Award: At thirty-seven, Janine is one of the oldest working stars in an industry dominated by teenagers. She looks sexier than ever and was poised and glowing as she accepted two awards.

Sisterhood Is Powerful Award: Kimberly Kane, winner of Best Oral Sex Scene in a Video, praised fellow starlet Belladonna: "Without her I don't think I'd be able to suck cock the way I do."

Porn Can Be Romantic Moment: Lexington Steele announces that he and girlfriend/fellow performer Vanessa Blue are getting married.

Best Porn Title: Award winner Camp Cuddly Pines Power Tool Massacre from Wicked Pictures.

It Never Should Have Been a Title and Now It's an Award-Winning One: Cumshitters was singled out for Best Anal Sex Scene between Manuel Ferrara and Katsumi, who proclaimed, "I didn't do anything. It was all Manuel!" Strange since she was the one with the cock up her ass.

 
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