By Alex Distefano
By Scott Snowden
By Anna Merlan
By Steve Almond
By Jena Ardell
By Jon Campbell
By Alan Scherstuhl
By Tessa Stuart
ARIES(March 21April 19): I suspect you'll be a genius of awkwardness in the coming week, Aries. What that means is that you'll have a knack for doing the half-right thing at the half-right timeand yet that's exactly what'll be necessary in order to bring about unexpected outcomes that are in everyone's best interests. In the short run you may make a perfect mess, but I bet that will ultimately add more beauty and intrigue to the big picture.
TAURUS(April 20May 20): Dear Grandma and Grandpa of the Taurus this horoscope has been prepared for: I'm hoping you will bring your helpful influence to bear on our little darling's dilemma. I know that in your ow n past you once had to navigate your way through complications similar to those that Taurus is now facing. So even if you have died and are in spirit form, please bestow your advice and encouragement, whether that's delivered by phone, via telepathy, in dreams, or in person. One more thing: Please don't let your wise blessing get tainted by any lingering disapproval you might be harboring about the path our beloved Taurus has chosen. This is a time for your smart love, not your judgment.
GEMINI(May 21June 20):In the language of archetypal psychology, the term hierosgamos means "sacred marriage." It may refer to a literal coming together of two people whose bond is a gift to God. Their love for each other serves as an inspiration to their community and galvanizes them both to express their wildest beauty. Because their union is dedicated to a higher cause beyond their personal happiness, they strive with ingenious devotion to transmute the dark, unripe aspects of their own nature. The term hierosgamos also has a bigger meaning, beyond the enlightened relationship of two intelligent people. It may refer to any merger of opposites that's precipitated through divine grace and that unleashes surprising healing in all directions. In the coming weeks, Gemini, you are a prime candidate to experience at least a metaphorical version of hierosgamos.
CANCER(June 21July 22): "A quiet evening alone with friends can be an ecstatic experience for Cancerians," say Gary Goldschneider and Joost Elffers in their book The Secret Language of Birthdays. "Yet many born under this sign have strange aspects to their personalities which must be periodically revealed in public." I suspect this description will be particularly apt in the coming weeks. You may feel an irresistible urge to express your eccentricities to a bigger audience. My advice is to make definite plans to unveil the most interesting versions of your oddness at times and places of your choosing. That way it won't unexpectedly pop out half cocked when it might cause embarrassment.
LEO(July 23Aug. 22):"The lover knows much more about absolute good and universal beauty than any logician or theologian," wrote philosopher George Santayana. I agree with him. That's why, as I analyze the astrological omens, I can confidently predict that you will have the right to claim all of the following titles in the coming weeks: the Beguiler With the Most Enticing Ideals, the Moral Authority With the Most Trustworthy Allure, and the Charmer With the Most Ethical Temptations.
VIRGO(Aug. 23Sept. 22): In the fairy tale "Hansel and Gretel," a wicked stepmother convinces her husband that the only way the two of them will survive poverty and starvation is to take his children deep into the woods and abandon them. That way there'll be two fewer mouths to feed. The kids overhear the plan, and as the adults lead them into the middle of nowhere, Hansel, the son, surreptitiously leaves a trail of white stones. This allows him and his sister Gretel to find their way back home later. The stepmom is chagrined. A few weeks thereafter, she once again convinces her spouse to leave the children in the wastes. This time Hansel drops bread crumbs to mark the path, but they're eaten by birds and the kids have no way to get back. Moral of the story: When you get sucked away from your source, leave clues that are more like stones, not crumbs. Alternative moral of the story: Don't return to a source that doesn't want you there.
LIBRA(Sept. 23Oct. 22): "The ancient Greeks knew that learning comes from playing," writes Roger von Oech in his book A Whack on the Side of the Head: How You Can Be More Creative. Their word for education, paideia, he says, was close to their word for play, paidia. Your next assignment, Libra, is right in line with this theme. First, identify the teachings that will be most important for you to master in 2007. Second, figure out how to include play as a major component of your learning process.
SCORPIO(Oct. 23Nov. 21): You know those fuel-delivery planes capable of pumping gas into a larger plane that's already aloft? I think you'd benefit from enlisting the services of their metaphorical equivalent in the coming week. Given how high and fast you're soaring, it would be a shame for you to have to come all the way down to earth to fill up your tank. And yet it's clear to me that one way or another, you're going to have to replenish your supply of propellant.