'Thr3e'

What happens when a thriller finds Jesus? It's bye-bye, blood and boobs. Thr3e, written by Left Behinder Alan B. McElroy, based on a Ted Dekker novel, and debuting as the first theatrical release from Fox's new Christian-friendly imprint Fox Faith, is on its dull surface the mystery of a psychopath/serial killer and his seminary-student prey—with God replacing gore. There are no dead bodies here, but perhaps filmgoers, tired of all those secular scares and heathen horrors, won't miss the aesthetic pleasure of a creative murder scene. Still, Marc Blucas as the hunted seminary student Kevin Parson might as well be dead for all his charisma, even with a backstory involving deceased parents and an unhinged, abusive Aunt Belinda (Priscilla Barnes, formerly Thr3e's Company's blonde no. 3 and currently looking like Courtney Love after a thr3e-week bender). Of course, Fox Faith wouldn't want you to trust our judgment; as the movie reminds us in its tidy moral, "We need the power of God to teach us good and evil." That awesome power has co-opted pop music and cornered the market on swearing-in ceremonies. Can't we at least have our cookie-cutter thrillers?