Totally Use Your Illusion, Dude

Rap stars see how the other half lives

Da Shop Boyz
"Party Like a Rockstar (Totally Dude)" From Rockstar Mentality (Universal Republic)

"Party Like a Rockstar"
Official remix featuring Shop Boyz, Jim Jones, Chamillionaire, and Lil Wayne (Universal Republic)

"Rock Star"
Unofficial remix featuring Flo-rida, Brisco, GunPlay, and Dre (Poe Boy Entertainment)

As you dudes and dudettes well know, "rock" has long been used as a code word for "white." Black rock musicians continue to be rendered largely invisible in America, but Shop Boyz's "Party Like a Rockstar" is a boon, a crunk-and-rock mash-up serving as a poignantly parodic whiteface minstrel show of rock stardom that's caught fire in Crunksville like the pyrotechnics at a Spinal Tap concert. Now there are "rockstar" nights in the hood–celebrating the rock style and attitude, and utilizing more goodtar-driven music.

On the Atlanta trio's original and its slew of remixes (same beat, different rappers), the partiers mockingly imagine themselves being stereotypically "white" (totally, dude), save a single reference to a Jimi Hendrix tattoo on Flo-Rida's arm in the "unofficial" Miami-rapper version. No one even mentions Lenny Kravitz. When you party like a rap star, Five-O clocks your every move. When you party like a rock star, though, you don't have to give a durn since there's no constant surveillance–you can "fly down 20 looking good in your hot car," as Sheed puts it, and not worry about getting stopped for DWB. Tequila runs, golfing, "getting a tan," and "surfing screaming 'kowabunga'" (what is this, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles?) . . . all this can be yours when you party like a rockstar.

Wouldn't it be great if VH1 created The Black Rocker Show and promoted it like The White Rapper Show, so we could watch these dudes totally try out?

Brisco: The groupies say the kid rock/I stand on the bar and tilt my hat like I'm Kid Rock.

Jim Jones: Young Tommy Lee/Big house on [Canavere]. (Stereotype alert: Due to the size of his member, Tommy Lee may actually be black.)

Flo-Rida: Metallica soul/Green Day when I'm reppin' the Poe/Gene Simmons we taggin' these 'hos.

Dre: You fucks don't know what rock 'n' roll is/You're looking at two-double-O-seven Axl Rose.

Chamillionaire: I am Bruce Blingsteen . . . Mick Jagger with my swagger.

The original "Party Like a Rockstar" rocks out in dirt fields and in trailer parks, populated by white dudes and dudettes with facial piercings and mohawks and gold grills. Hood rock this very well may be–the production by Pit is a hoot, with its stock Slash-style guitar rips. And the irony: Slash is a black dude.

 
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