Come on, baby, light my "small illuminated vessel." That's the sort of thing kids will create at the Center for Architecture's annual Festival of Lights. The session will cover the luminous traditions of Thailand, the Philippines, India, Egypt, Holland, Mexico, etc. And they'll build wearable radiant art. cfafoundation.org

In Sweden, Santa Claus is called Tomte. He's a gnome who lives under the floorboards. (It could be worse: Presents used to be delivered by a Yule goat.) This may confuse young children, but attending Scandinavia House's A Swedish Christmas Workshop should make matters clear. Children will participate in julpysseldag (Christmas craft day), making woven hearts, paper angels, and yarn gnomes.scandinaviahouse.org

"The Bronx?" wrote Ogden Nash. "No Thonx!" But families with children ages five to 11 may feel rather more warm toward the Bronx—or, at least, the Bronx Museum—after attending its Family Affair workshop, which features guided tours, screenings, and hands-on art activities. December's Family Affair will celebrate the holiday season. bronxmuseum.org

Film/Video Perhaps you're a bit too busy or penurious to devote several years and the odd hundred thou for a film-school degree. But if your lack of camera skills prevents your making a timeless contribution to world cinema— or YouTube—Brooklyn College offers a quick and cost-effective solution: Hollywood Film Institute: Two-Day Film School, which ostensibly launched the careers of Quentin Tarantino and Spike Lee. In one weekend—with time for sleeping and eating—you will learn enough to make and sell your masterpiece. academic.brooklyn.cuny.edu

We had long believed that the sole require-ments for becoming a VJ are an attractive visage and a sublime vacuity. (Yeah, we're still trying to figure out that whole Kennedy thing.) But apparently, it involves such strange skills and instruments as Edirol V-4, Modul8, Motion Dive, and Union. Goodness! Dubspot offers a weekend intensive course in VJ Tools & Techniques, which should explain all these recondite terms. dubspot.com

ART

Would-be old masters (and mistresses, too, we imagine) may benefit from this Art Students League Workshop, Renaissance Drawing Techniques. Over five mornings, artist Alicia Rothman will lead students in the techniques and methods promulgated by Leonardo, Michelangelo, and their estimable ilk. Students will also learn how to create their own drawing materials. theartstudentsleague.org

The ancient art of printing dates back as far as the Phaistos disks from 15th-century B.C. Minos. So if your ink-jet printer no longer thrills you and you'd like to return to printing's ancient and more visceral roots, the Center for Book Arts offers many courses in printing, including a weekend making natty Letterpress Notecards and Business Cards. In addition to acquiring skills, students will also acquire 24 handsome business cards. centerforbookarts.org/classes

COMPUTERS

We weren't aware that Web publishing hurt very much (unless you're being flayed on Gawker, of course), but Baruch College's School of Continuing and Professional Studies offers a class in Painless Web Publishing as well as many other courses designed to help you better love and understand your Apple or PC. The Painless class teaches would-be bloggers—surely someone without a blog remains—how to establish a site without knowing even a line of HTML. baruched.com

LANGUAGES

Ciao, bella! If you'd like to learn to order your gelato (or pasta, pizza, or pinot grigio) in the original, you might consider taking Elementary Italian at the Scuola Italiana del Greenwich Village. (Lesson 1: Translate that.) Housed in the suitably Italianate Our Lady of Pompeii School, classes run evenings, lunch-times, and Saturdays. Bonus: The school's website boasts "Traditional Recipes" and an actual "Military Secret."scuolaitaliana.org

New York State boasts more than three million Spanish speakers. Lest you prevent yourself from communicating with such a sizable population, the Insituto Cervantes offers language courses ranging from Elementary Spanish to Superior Spanish and special courses in Spanish for Business, Spanish for Medical Personnel, Spanish Guitar, and Wine Seminars. Dos cristales de vino rojo, por favor. nuevayork.cervantes.es

CRAFTS

We're living in a material world, but, as anyone who's ever rescued a sofa from the street knows, some material is much nicer than others. Those who would like to improve the fabrics of their lives may wish to enroll in the Furniture Joint's monthly Upholstery Class. Students will learn such recondite skills such as "re-springing" and "sewing." (Sewing, imagine!) Lest you fear lugging your love seat to class, tools, equipment, and sample pieces will be supplied. furniturejoint.com

You could deck the halls with boughs of holly, fa la la la la, or you could take a few classes at the Brooklyn Botanic Garden and learn some other options for plant-based holiday decor. Thanksgiving Floral Design instructs in the creation of toothsome centerpieces, Holiday Greens tutors students in wreathes and swags, and Victorian Holiday Treasures revives the dormant art of boxwood topiary. bbg.org

Some like it hot, very hot, temperatures in excess of 1,315 degrees Celsius hot. You can feel the heat in December as Brooklyn's Urban Glass, the 30-year-old glass studio, offers a Beginning Glassblowing Weekend. In the 17,000-square-foot studio, students will learn how to use basic tools and eventually create a paperweight and a drinking glass. Cheers! urbanglass.org

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