By Alex Distefano
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Q: Its great to hear such a sex-positive approach, but youve done a number of media appearances on cybersex, and I wonder if those dont often give audiences the wrong impression: that there is something fundamentally bad about cybersex. Your colleague and co-author Dr. Weiss, for example, called online sex the crack cocaine of sex addiction. You very rarely hear an expert on television saying cybersex can be part of a healthy life.
A: Again, if you look at drinking, how many programs do you see on TV or in the newspaper about people whose life is enriched because they go out to dinner and have a drink? Not very many, as opposed to articles about drunk driving. Because whats news? Something thats positive is not news.
Q: It may be true that its not news, butto keep up your analogyits certainly true theres a section of our culture that encourages the positive side of alcohol. You can drink wine in nice restaurants, go to wine tasting, read wine magazines Theres a space for it in the media and the culture that doesnt exist for sex on the internet.
A: That may be.
Q: Have you ever done first-hand research into cybersexas in, have you ever had cybersex yourself or observed anyone having it?
A: Ive done surveys and talked to patients. Its not like Im just doing this because Ive heard someone say whatever. As to whether Ive gone online myself, I havent, specifically because these days even if you dont go online you are totally deluged with email. For example, if somehow you get on this or that persons list and then they sell the list to everybody else. Every day I probably get thirty emails about enlarge your penis. So even without getting on any porn websites, I know what theyre like. All you have to do is just go once on a porn site and immediately your address gets spread out. I just really dont need that in my life. So the answer is, no I havent.