Does OkCupid Shoot Digital Arrows?

Dating site co-founder Sam Yagan talks about cybersex, polyamory, and why other dating sites are online zoos

What about people who are interested in having online sex, not necessarily meeting up with other users in real life. Is there a place for them on OkCupid?

SY: I wouldn’t say most people are coming to OkCupid for cybersex. But if you were to put on your profile, “Hey, one of the things I’m interested in is cybersex, I’m very, very confident than in short order you’ll start finding people who have that interest… We have a lot of sexual content on the site. If I go to your profile, and you’ve taken the “Do you give a good blowjob?” test, then I’ve got an easy segue to start talking to you about blowjobs. I don’t have to ask, “Do you wanna cyber?” I can just be like, “Hey, you seem to think you give good head. Tell me about it.” Now you’re essentially cybering, right? There was no cyber foreplay needed. Also, because the site is free, you see a lot of people chatting with people who are far away from each other—someone in the U.S. and in France, someone in California and someone in Florida—and at 2 in the morning you’ve got to wonder what they’re really talking about. There’s this sense that it’s not so serious, that it’s not just about getting married. I think if you start flirting with someone who’s 2000 miles away, cybering is a place you get to pretty quickly.

Previously in Click Me: Jenna Jameson: Virtual Sex Machine

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Heroine Sheik
Bonnie Ruberg's blog about sex, tech, gender, and videogames

Click Me runs on villagevoice.com on Mondays. Got a question about cybersex? Write to your friendly cyberhood sexpert Bonnie Ruberg to ask advice or to share stories about sex and the internet: bonnie [at] heroine-sheik [dot] com.

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