He's middle-aged, married, balding, pot-bellied, and pale as sandpaper—and God, he's so damn sick of being sexy! But comedian Jim Gaffigan knows his sexiness is a privilege, so he's doing his best to share it with everyone in his newest project, The Sexy Tour. For all you die-hard fans that have followed the Comedy Central star and devotedly watched him countless times on Letterman and Conan, expect to hear his classic pontifications on the divinity of bacon and his love/hate relationship with Hot Pockets. He'll also be discussing beanbags, bowling, and laziness by way of escalators and moving stairs, among other riveting subjects. For those new to Gaffigan's style: If you start hearing a high-pitched feminine voice come out of his vocal chords, he's not going schizo—it's just his trademark way of expressing what he thinks you're thinking of him. He's kind of a girly-man like that.
Nov. 28-29, 8 & 10:30 p.m., 2008