Bernie Madoff Mocked at Party!

Fortunately, lots of people—well, gay people—still care about Broadway.

Qualified but duped, singer Cynthia Crane was one of those people screwed over by Bernie Madoff (you care about him, remember?), as I learned at the same event. Crane and her hubby had to sell their house to pay off debts, so they had a party where an effigy of Madoff forlornly hung from the ceiling. I hear one Palm Beach publication thought a photo of the faux-corpse was too tasteless to run, but Vanity Fair will go with it. Honey, even if it was a shot of the real Madoff hanging, I don't think it would be all that tasteless!

People might not give a shit about Paris Hilton right now, but they might care about Paris 36, the period musical with medium hair that just opened the "Rendez-vous With French Cinema" series. Its star, 20-year-old beauty Nora Arnezeder, was delightfully self-effacing at the premiere, telling me that the film hasn't made her a household name in France, where "Sophie Marceau and Marion Cotillard are stars, but I'm not. People don't recognize me on the streets." Still, Arnezeder showed amazing confidence in brazenly wielding a champagne glass before my eyes, even though she's not legal here. "Police!" I mock-screamed. "Shhh!" she urged, laughing.

Champers flowed at the Skinny, a Thursday-night event via promoters Michael Formika Jones and Mark Nelson, which is the latest attempt to make gay magic happen at Touch. This time, they really took the club's name to heart: On opening night, a massage table was set up where you could sprawl out and let a half-naked man rub oil into your pores. Everyone ended up feeling like a salad, and that was fantastic: cheap eats!

The solid cast of Rock of Ages
Joan Marcus
The solid cast of Rock of Ages

For dessert, here's some totally free gossip: I hear Sarah Jessica Parker won't be doing print publicity for Spinning Into Butter, which she produced and stars in; insiders guess that she doesn't want to be asked any marital questions. Is that a ringing in her ears? And speaking of the sanctity of straight wedlock, Jerry Lewis has always professed husbandly fidelity, but in an upcoming book called Confessions of a Rat Pack Party Girl, the title libertine claims she had sex with the goofball comic, and his idea of staying true to his wedding vows involved making sure to not come inside her—even though she was calm and spacious! Is that dark enough for you?

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