CAPRICORN [December 22–January 19] Did you hear about the Korean woman who has failed her driving test 800 times? Or the American man who has filled out job applications at 25 Pizza Huts in 20 cities without being hired? Or the British artist who has completed over 5,000 paintings even though no gallery has ever shown his work? There is something about you that resembles those persistently frustrated people—or at least has resembled them up until now. Soon, I predict, the dogged efforts you've made will finally pay off in at least a modest success, and perhaps even more if you'll make an effort to free your mind of its backlog of sad images.

AQUARIUS [January 20–February 18] According to polls, more than half the population believes they are fantastic kissers. How did they get that way? Some people say they have rehearsed extensively by smooching the backs of their own hands or rubbing their lips up against posters of celebrities. Whether you've tried these techniques or have developed other strategies, Aquarius, I advise you to bone up on your skills. Not this week, but soon, you will be entering a prime romantic phase of your astrological cycle—a time when you will have the potential to accomplish wonders and marvels with your mouth.

PISCES [February 19–March 20] How do you deal with those three periods every year when Mercury is retrograde, as it is between May 7 and 30? I'd like you to consider the meditations of artist and activist Gabrielle Senza: "I think of Mercury retrograde as a big obnoxious Rottweiler on a chain that bares its teeth, lunging and barking as I walk by. I can choose to experience it in one of three ways: 1) as a frightening moment that catches me off-guard; 2) as a humorous interlude that allows me to make fun of what I'm afraid of because I know it can't hurt me; 3) as an opportunity to change my route, usually leading to some wonderful surprise that rewards my instinct to willingly depart from my plans and projections."

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PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia:
How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings

by Rob Brezsny




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