By Jena Ardell
By Jon Campbell
By Alan Scherstuhl
By Tessa Stuart
By Roy Edroso
By Jon Campbell
By Albert Samaha
By Zachary D. Roberts
Her escort, Paper's Dennis Dermody, had his own wacky tale of recent, indecent filmgoing. "I went with Willem Dafoe's son, Jack, to see Lars von Trier's Antichrist, in which there's genital torture and Willem gets his crotch smashed by a cinder block," enthused the critic. "It was fun!" Well, apparently there's a lot there to smash.
Walnuts were smashed and served with all kinds of fancy fish and meats at the James Beard Foundation's Chefs & Champagne event at the Wolffer estate in Sagaponack. The spread was sumptuous—there was everything but doughnuts—and it was an extra treat to run into director Joel Schumacher, who has made many a fun popcorn flick. I asked him about Sparkle, the 1976 girl-group musical he wrote, which I always felt was the original Dreamgirls. "I'm loath to say that," Schumacher told me, "because Michael Bennett was a great friend of mine. And everyone could say I got the idea from the Supremes or Martha and the Vandellas." But the movie, he added, "came when there were so many black exploitation films. It speaks to a human side, not just pimps and hos."
All the more reason it would make a great Broadway musical, right? "Russell Simmons wants to do one," Schumacher revealed. "I just met with him about it!" Fantastic! I bet Beyoncé would come out of the Burger King for that one.
For dessert, Broadway's new ballroom dancing show, Burn the Floor, had an open rehearsal for the press, where we met co-producer Carrie Ann Inaba, "the feisty but fair judge on Dancing With the Stars." Inaba gushed that the show is "super-hot, super-sexy, entertaining, and family-friendly." Sure enough, they presented some excerpts, which had scantily clad people spinning each other around spread-eagle, while vigorously flicking their hair as if in a Lars von Trier film. I guess you can bring the whole super-hot, super-sexy family.
Obama family friend Isabel Toledo told me that she doesn't tweet, she isn't on Facebook, and she doesn't have a cell phone. "If you can't reach us," the designer told me about herself and her hubby, "there's a reason" (i.e., they're busy somewhere!).
But some fashion folks are expanding their communications arenas. In the fall, the Sundance Channel is starting a lavish site called fullfrontalfashion.com. I incontrovertibly know this because they e-mailed me, desperate to hire . . . someone else. They won't let me in! They won't let me in!