By Alex Distefano
By Scott Snowden
By Anna Merlan
By Steve Almond
By Jena Ardell
By Jon Campbell
By Alan Scherstuhl
By Tessa Stuart
Moving on to head cheese, Michael "Formika" Jones has resurrected the weekly gay bash the F Word—it's now at Rebel on Fridays—and vows, "I'm making it really whorey this time." How appalling! Put me on the list! Also threatening a return, the Mr. Black people moved their place so many times that when the last incarnation went kaput, a lot of people didn't realize it was there in the first place. This thing travels more than a boozy country singer.
The Tuesday-night gay hangout Beige is still there, and though the crowd gets sparser in the winter—bring on the filler—they're way less inhibited than usual. Last week, a young gentleman barreled up to my table, impulsively pulled out his scrotal sac, and acted out some delightful puppetry of the testes, obviously in hopes of an Obie nomination. But for the life of him, he could not do a scene from Dog Day Afternoon.
Also in place forever, the atmospheric West Village piano bar Marie's Crisis attracts a spunky crowd right out of Awakenings—you know, the kind who've had strokes and can't remember anything except showtunes. But the pianists there know exactly what they're doing, and if Nine had been making any kind of big impact, they would surely be playing a song or two from it. They're not! They're saying nein to Nine! It would break their unspoken rule of never going past the '70s anyway.
A bigger screen hit, Sandra Bullock is the top box-office star of the year, but now that she's clicked bigger than ever, Sandra freely admits that she has no acting on her gold-trimmed plate for two years. "I can't even look through the pile of scripts I have," she told a reporter friend of mine, exasperated. I guess Sandy's custody battle against that porn star is enough to keep her creative juices flowing. And that isn't happening on Manhunt, by the way.
And, finally, Ethan Hawke's name got the futuristic vampire film Daybreakers greenlit, resulting in his saying lines like, "Life's a bitch and then you don't die." At the premiere, the directors swore the filmmaking experience "was good, gooey fun," though Ethan ended up with his undies full of fake blood after a mishap one day. Rather than perform some kind of red puppet show, he nicely agreed to a clean-up and a reshoot. Jeez, that guy can act!