SAGITTARIUS [November 22–December 21] In the movies I've seen that depict battle scenes from hundreds of years ago, every army has soldiers whose job it is to carry festive flags. If this is an accurate depiction of history, what does it mean? That they were more inclined to do their best if inspired to imagine they were participating in an epic story? Whether or not my theories apply to what actually happened back then, they apply to you now. As you go forth to fight for what you believe in, bring your equivalent of an evocative emblem.

CAPRICORN [December 22–January 19] Using a radio telescope, astronomers at Germany's Max Planck Institute have been looking for evidence of amino acids that could be the building blocks of life. So far, their hunt has been inconclusive. In my opinion, though, they've stumbled upon an even more appealing discovery: The huge dust cloud at the heart of the Milky Way, they say, tastes like raspberries and smells like rum. That's the kind of switcheroo I predict for you in the upcoming weeks, Capricorn. You may not locate the smoking gun you're hoping to find, but in the process of searching, I bet you'll hook up with something even better.

AQUARIUS [January 20–February 18] Each one of us is a blend of life and death. In the most literal sense, our bodies always contain old cells that are dying and new cells that are emerging as replacements. From a more metaphorical perspective, our familiar ways of seeing and thinking are constantly atrophying, even as fresh modes emerge. Both losing and winning are woven into every day; sinking down and rising up, shrinking and expanding. In any given phase of our lives, one or the other polarity is usually more pronounced. But for you in the foreseeable future, Aquarius, they will be evenly balanced. Welcome to the Season of Rot and Regeneration.

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To buy access, go here.
The audio horoscopes are also available by phone at 1-877-873-4888 begin_of_the_skype_highlighting 1-877-873-4888 end_of_the_skype_highlighting or 1-900-950-7700.




Revised and expanded 2009 edition of Pronoia Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings

by Rob Brezsny




Check out Rob's band World Entertainment War.

Listen to MP3s, read the lyrics, or buy the cd, Give Too Much.




Want to know more about Rob, or look up past horoscopes? Visit freewillastrology.com.

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PISCES [February 19–March 20] Allure magazine sought out Luca Turin and Tania Sanchez, the women who wrote tPerfumes: The A–Z Guide, and asked: "What are the sexiest-smelling perfumes of all time?" The women said Chinatown was at the top of their list. Their explanation: "If wearing Opium is like walking around with a bullhorn shouting, 'Come and get it!,' Chinatown is like discreetly whispering the same thing." The Chinatown approach is what I recommend for you in the coming weeks, Pisces.

Homework: What book do you suspect would change your life if you actually read it? When will you get around to reading it? Testify at Truthrooster@gmail.com.

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