By Jared Chausow
By Katie Toth
By Elizabeth Flock
By Albert Samaha
By Anna Merlan
By Jon Campbell
By Jon Campbell
By Albert Samaha
ARIES [March 21–April 19] "Basic research is what I am doing when I don't know what I am doing," said rocket scientist Wernher von Braun. I think it's an excellent time for you to plunge into that kind of basic research, Aries. You're overdue to wander around frontiers you didn't even realize you needed to investigate. You're ready to soak up insights from outside the boundaries of your understanding. In fact, I think it's your sacred duty to expose yourself to raw truths and unexpected vistas.
TAURUS [April 20–May 20] In Woody Allen's film Midnight in Paris, the Ernest Hemingway character says, "All cowardice comes from not loving or not loving well enough." Given the state of your current astrological omens, Taurus, that is an excellent piece of advice. I suspect you are going to be asked to call on previously untapped reserves of courage in the coming weeks—not because you'll have to face physical danger but rather because you will have a chance to get to the bottom of mysteries that can only be explored if you have more courage than you've had. And the best way to summon the valor you'll need is to love like a god or goddess loves.
GEMINI [May 21–June 20] "When I see your face, the stones start spinning!" wrote the poet Rumi, as translated by Coleman Barks. "Water turns pearly. Fire dies down and doesn't destroy. In your presence I don't want what I thought I wanted." I think you need to be in the presence of a face like that, Gemini. You've got to get your fixations scrambled by an arresting vision of soulful authenticity. You need your colors transposed and your fire and water reconfigured. Most of all, it's crucial that you get nudged into transforming your ideas about what you really want.
CANCER [June 21–July 22] "All my life I have longed to be loved by a woman who was melancholy, thin, and an actress," wrote 19th-century French author Stendhal in his diary. "Now I have been, and I am not happy." I myself had a similar experience: craving a particular type of woman who, when she finally showed up in the flesh, disappointed me. But it turned out to be a liberating experience. Relieved of my delusory fantasy, I was able to draw more joy from what life was actually giving me. As you contemplate your own loss, Cancerian, I hope you will find the release and deliverance I did.
LEO [July 23–August 22] If you traveled 300 million years back in time, you might freak out in abject fear as you encountered dragonflies as big as eagles and cockroaches the size of dogs. But since you're quite safe here in the present, there's no need to worry. Similarly, if you managed to locate a time machine and return to an earlier phase of your current life, you'd come upon certain events that upset you and derailed you way back then. And yet the odds are high that you're not going to find a time machine. So maybe you could agree to relinquish all the anxiety you're still carrying from those experiences that can no longer upset and derail you. Now would be an excellent moment to do so.
VIRGO [August 23–September 22] To prepare for her role in the film The Help, actress Jessica Chastain forced herself to gain 15 pounds. It was tough because she normally follows a healthy diet. The strategy that worked best was to ingest a lot of calorie-heavy, estrogen-rich ice cream made from soybeans. To be in alignment with current cosmic rhythms, it would make sense for you to fatten yourself up, too, Virgo—metaphorically speaking, that is. I think you'd benefit from having more ballast, more gravitas. You need to be sure you're well-anchored and not easy to push around. It's nearly time to take an unshakable stand for what you care about most.
LIBRA [September 23–October 22] In a famous Monty Python sketch, a Hungarian tourist goes into a British tobacconist's store to buy cigarettes. Since he doesn't speak English, he consults a phrase book to find the right words. "My hovercraft is full of eels," he tells the clerk, who's not sure what he means. The tourist tries again: "Do you want to come back to my place, bouncy bouncy?" Again, the clerk is confused. In the coming week, Libra, I foresee you having to deal with communications that are equally askew. Be patient. Try your best to figure out the intentions and meanings behind odd messages. Your translating skills are at a peak, fortunately, as are your abilities to understand what other people—even fuzzy thinkers—are saying.
SCORPIO [October 23–November 21] There are modern Chinese painters who use oil paints on canvas to create near-perfect replicas of famous European masterpieces. So while the genuine copy of Van Gogh's "Starry Night" is worth more than $100 million, you can buy an excellent copy on the Internet for less than $100. If you're faced with a comparable choice in the coming week—whether to go with a pricey original or a cheaper but good facsimile, I suggest you take the latter. You just need what works, not what gives you prestige.