You Can Get A Decent Apartment In NYC! Sort Of!

Just don't look for a new place, and you'll be fine!

They kept looking, but realized that for anything decent, the competition was crushing. So Bruce is staying put—and to help make up for the rent hike, he just canceled his cable and has decided to bring his lunch to work.

So you all might want to ignore everything I said before. Just stay where you are and start packing a tuna sandwich!

Read more Michael Musto at La Dolce Musto
NANU Illustration

musto@villagevoice.com

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22 comments
MustoGoAway
MustoGoAway

JEW YORK CITY HAS LOTS OF CHICKS THAT ARE INTO YOGA IT"S REALLY A GREAT INVESTMENT OPPORTUNITY YOGA MATS AND HERPES

MustoGoHome
MustoGoHome

NEW YORK NEEDS MORE BANDS LIKE JEWISH MAROON 5. THEY ARE ALMOST AS GOOD AS RHIANNA. JEW YORK POLICE STATE CITY IS A GREAT INVESTMENT, BECAUSE OF THE CULTURE

HasBeenMusto
HasBeenMusto

Jew York POlice State City is well past its prime. You're a moron to invest here.

IdiotMustoHasBeenDouche
IdiotMustoHasBeenDouche

That's SO HEARTWARMING to hear about Bruce and his boyfriend! This article is so diverse and tolerant, it just fills my heart with joy! We've come so far since Stonewall!

StupidNewYorkers
StupidNewYorkers

JAY-Z AND RHIANNA ARE THE GREATEST ARTISTS OF OUR AGE. JEW YORK POLICE STATE CITY IS A CENTER OF CULTURE

PukeMusto
PukeMusto

Home values in Old York Neo-Boshevik Jewish Police State City are going down the toilet. Jew York Police State City is a stupid investment.

VomitMusto
VomitMusto

has-been Jew York City is about 7 or 8 years behind San Francisco in terms of culture. If you're looking for culture, has-been Jew Yorck Police State City is not where you're going to find it, unless 72 year old homosexuals wearing dresses is your idea of culture.

Stupidnewyork
Stupidnewyork

I hear there are REAL GENUINE ANARCHISTS who live on the lower east side and are part of the "downtown scene". RAGE AGAINST THE CUL-DE_SAC

Asdgou3ta32
Asdgou3ta32

Oh yeah man! THe 'downtown scene' yeah, it's so exciting to be around gray haired old commies and f*cked-out jewish crack whores! New York is so exciting!

Asdhgliduddsa
Asdhgliduddsa

Jew York City is a has-been, police-state crap hole filled with old aids-infected homosexuals, with ZERO in terms of culture. (except for "the museums" of the past that every one mentions when you bring up the lack of culture in Old York Police State City). Especially odious are people like Musto - what a drag. Expect apartments in this has-been city to become increasingly available going forward. No one wants to live in a has-been city where the jewish mayor forbids you from owning a gun to defend yourself against the violent "people of color" infesting this welfare trash hole.

If you love being randomly searched by jew-sponsored NYPD goon squads, and being sniffed by police-state canines while the worst of old homosexuals parade their trash culture on bway and elsewhere, then New York City is the place to be!

Face it, musto, you are a disgusting has-been homosexual, and its people like you that have ruined the city.

LIMEN!
LIMEN!

I've always been shocked at how small, and over priced the apts in NYC are. I remember meeting a great young man, back in 1989. He had a fabulous job that aperson would die for. When we got to his three floor walk up. No problem to me. Well when he opened the door, it was a 10'x10' room. No window. A bed, and no closet or bathroom. I don't know how he lived there. He said that he tried to just sleep there.Ilove the big city life, the arts, and all the great people but those socalled apt. Thank God, that I have friends to stay with.

mec
mec

1500 for a shoebox room in a bootbox apartment? Well, its pretty high but Im actually shocked its not even more expensive.

Mark Brandt
Mark Brandt

I don't know New Yorkers do it.... I'm amazed at the rent prices.

I love visiting New York but could never ever afford to live there.

anonymouse
anonymouse

"3000 a month but there are nice restaurants." Which of course you'll eat at often with the plentiful discretionary income you'll have left over after the rent.

Christopher
Christopher

$1500 a month is more than half my income. I don't know where these recent college grads are working but I want their jobs! Meanwhile, I share in Prospect Lefferts Gardens. My room is $683 a month. In a newly renovated apartment. Which is enormous and has a full kitchen with dishwasher. And it's 40 minutes to mid-town and I can walk to Prospect Park. Why oh why people live in Inwood and the Heights for twice as much and a longer commute I don't know.

recent grad
recent grad

um. I wish $3000 a month sounded reasonable...I'm thinking more like $6-800 is what most recent grads would be lucky to be able to shell out....

Gregorama
Gregorama

Thanks for the helpful pointers. As a recent apartent-searcher myself, I may be of some help here as well: For reasons which still puzzle me, some of the best bargains to be found in Manhattan are on....The Upper East Side! Not the 5th to Lexington part, but east of Lexington, from the 70's-low 90's (aka Yorkville). After being banished to Inwood (for complicated reasons), last year I literally STALKED Craigslist for about 3 months, checking every half-hour or so for new listings. I had only a few, if stringent, "must-haves": Under $1500 monthly, no broker fee; outdoor space; below 96th on the UES (elevator, in-building laundry, dishwasher, fireplace were all "would-love-to-haves"). I looked at one place on 82nd and York (dump) and then found a listing that sounded too good to be true: Alcove studio at 76th/2nd, $1450, no fee and ALL of my must-haves and love-to-haves (except the fireplace). Turns out there was an error in the listing. It should have been $1650, but since I'd printed out a "screen shot" of the Craigslist ad, the broker (fee paid by owner) had to honor the listed price. SO, the lesson here is: Craigslist is the ONLY way to get a no-fee rental right now (though in just one year, I understand that "no-fee rentals" are becoming few and far between). PRINT OUT the listing! With my 2-year lease, I save $4800 right there. The south-facing terrace is such a luxury in a Manhattan studio. And hell...if I'm still alive in 2018, I'll have a new subway line right around the corner!

Tinytimber
Tinytimber

You're so right about how hard it is to bag a good rental nowadays, espec. in Manhattan. I don't know where all these rich people are coming from. Wasn't there a recession?

Teatro
Teatro

Thanks for the tips! I will either stay where I am or I will consider the Financial district!

VonD
VonD

Thank you. It's insanity, barely rationalized!

VonD
VonD

UES off York has been decent for decades now. Back in the mid-1990s, when apartments were trending upwards in the $900-$1200 range in many places, you could still get apartments off York for about $600-$700. Not sure why it remains below the rest of the market, but maybe it's because you're farther from the subway, that is, until the 2nd Ave. mess-in-progress in finished. Then all bets are off.

 
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