By Keegan Hamilton
By Albert Samaha
By Village Voice staff
By Tessa Stuart
By Albert Samaha
By Steve Weinstein
By Devon Maloney
By Tessa Stuart
SAGITTARIUS [November 22–December 21] Please raise your hand if you have ever sought out a romantic connection with someone mostly because of the way he or she looked. You shouldn't feel bad if you have; it's pretty common. But I hope you won't indulge in this behavior anytime soon. In the coming weeks, it's crucial for you to base your decisions on deeper understandings—not just in regard to potential partners and lovers, but for everything. As you evaluate your options, don't allow physical appearance and superficial attractiveness to be the dominant factors.
CAPRICORN [December 22–January 19] The 21st flight of the 4.5-billion-pound space shuttle Discovery was supposed to happen on June 8, 1995. But about a week before its scheduled departure, workers discovered an unforeseen problem: Northern Flicker woodpeckers had made a mess of the insulation on the outer fuel tank. They'd pecked a couple of hundred holes, some quite deep. To allow for necessary repairs, launch was postponed for more than a month. I'm choosing this scenario to serve as a useful metaphor for you, Capricorn. Regard it as your notice not to ignore a seemingly tiny adversary or trivial obstacle.
AQUARIUS [January 20–February 18] Dancing increases your intelligence. So says a report in the New England Journal of Medicine. Unfortunately, research found that swimming, bicycling, and playing golf are not at all effective in rewiring the brain's neural pathways. Doing crossword puzzles is somewhat helpful, though, and so is reading books. But one of the single best things you can do to enhance your cognitive functioning is to move your body around in creative and coordinated rhythm with music. Lucky you: This is a phase of your astrological cycle when you're likely to have opportunities to dance.
PISCES [February 19–March 20] Your animal totem for the next phase of your astrological cycle is a creature called a hero shrew. Of all the mammals in the world, it has the strongest and heaviest spine proportionate to its size. This attribute makes the tiny animal so robust that a person could stand on it without causing serious harm. You will need to have a backbone like that in the coming weeks, Pisces. Luckily, the universe will be conspiring to help you. I expect to see you stand up to the full weight of the pressures coming to bear.
"Discovery" weighed 4.5 billion pounds? You need to double check that. I don't think any human-made object weighing anywhere near that much was ever launched. There aren't rockets strong enough to do it. A rocket big enough to do it, launched from Cape Canaveral, would most likely set off an earthquake felt along the entire Eastern Seaboard, all of the Caribbean Sea and Gulf of Mexico, and out into the Atlantic almost to the African coast. Check your figures.
Re: Cancer 'scope: "Turn and walk away from the darkness"? Sounds like good advice. But not much use if the darkness surrounds you in all directions. What do you do then?
if bullets can bounce of me do you suppose that I can make bullets bounce off those who hate you. Why not do it and send them forward. Opps!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!