By Keegan Hamilton
By Albert Samaha
By Village Voice staff
By Tessa Stuart
By Albert Samaha
By Steve Weinstein
By Devon Maloney
By Tessa Stuart
ARIES [March 21–April 19] "They are trying to make me into a fixed star," complained religious leader Martin Luther a few centuries ago. "I am an irregular planet." I invite you to use that declaration as your own in the coming weeks. You have every right to avoid being pinned down, pigeonholed, and forced to be consistent. You need abundant freedom to mutate your identity.
TAURUS [April 20–May 20] "The Star-Spangled Banner" is America's national anthem. It features the lyrics of a patriotic poem written by Francis Scott Key, but the melody itself is entirely lifted from a bawdy old song that celebrates Bacchus, the ancient god of wine and ecstatic dancing. I love it when things are repurposed as dramatically as that. The coming weeks will be prime time to repurpose stuff with creative abandon.
GEMINI [May 21–June 20] I'm guessing that in the coming weeks, you will be receiving a multitude of inquiries, invitations, and temptations—probably more than you feel capable of responding to, and certainly more than you should respond to. A few of these opportunities might be appealing and lead to interesting adventures. But some will be useless. Will you be able to tell the difference? If you'd like help dodging unwanted solicitations, give out this phone number as your own: 212-479-7990. It's a free service provide by the Rejection Line at rejectionline.com. People calling that number will be politely told you aren't available.
CANCER [June 21–July 22] For millennia, the plant known as the yellow avalanche lily has thrived throughout western North America. It blooms early in the spring, just in time for broad-tailed hummingbirds that migrate from Central America to sip the flower's nectar. But now there's a problem with that ancient arrangement. Due to global warming, the lily now blossoms 17 days earlier than it used to. But the hummingbirds haven't made an adjustment in their schedule, so they're barely showing up in time to get their full allotment of nectar. I suspect this is a metaphor for a shift you might be facing in your own life rhythm.
LEO [July 23–August 22] In our calendar, there is no special holiday devoted to honoring the joy and power of rebellion. This oversight confounds me. All my experience tells me that the urge to revolt is a fundamental human need. Every one of us has a sacred duty to regularly rise up and overthrow a stale status quo. I'm telling you this, Leo, because it's an excellent time to celebrate your own Rebellion Jubilee. Your vitality will soar as you shed numbing habits and decaying traditions.
VIRGO [August 23–September 22] Recently, you've had resemblances to an eight-year-old kid wearing the pajamas you loved when you were five. Your bare arms are jutting out beyond where the sleeves end. The fabric is ripped here and there because it can't accommodate how much you've grown. This is somewhat cute but mostly alarming. Wean yourself of the past and update your approach.
LIBRA [September 23–October 22] A lot of leopard frogs live on Staten Island, one of New York City's five boroughs. Most of them make a sound that resembles a long snore or a rapid chuckle. But over the years, biologists have also detected a third type of frogly expression: a clipped, repetitive croak. Just this year, they finally figured out that this belonged to an entirely distinct species of leopard frog that they had never before identified. It's still so new it doesn't have a name yet. I expect a metaphorically similar development in your life, Libra. You will become aware of a secret that has been hiding in plain sight.
SCORPIO [October 23–November 21] Tom Tolbert is a sports talk show host on San Francisco radio station KNBR. I am amazingly neutral about him. Nothing he says fascinates me or mirrors my own thoughts. On the other hand, he never makes me mad, and he's not boring. I neither like him nor dislike him. I simply see him for who he is. He has become a symbol of the possibility that I'm able to look at a human being with complete impartiality. In the coming week, I suggest you try to achieve this enlightened state of mind on a regular basis.
SAGITTARIUS [November 22–December 21] If you say "rabbit, rabbit, rabbit" as soon as you wake up on the first day of the month, you will have good luck for the next 30 to 31 days. At least that's how reality works according to a British superstition. But judging from your astrological omens, I don't think you will have to resort to magic tricks like that. In the next four weeks, I suspect you will be the beneficiary of a flood of cosmic mojo. If it would give you even more confidence to invoke your favorite superstitions, though, go right ahead. Even scientists say that kind of thing works: tinyurl.com/superstitiousboost.
CAPRICORN [December 22–January 19] According to Greek myth, Perseus cut off the head of Medusa. She was the creature whose hair was composed of snakes and whose gaze could turn a person into stone. The immortal winged horse Pegasus was born from Medusa's blood. He became an ally to the nine muses, and Zeus relied on him to carry thunder and lightning. I predict that while you're sleeping, you will have a dream that contains elements of this myth. Here's a preliminary interpretation of that dream: You are undergoing a transition that could in a sense give you the power of flight and a more abundant access to a muse.