"Fag Hag"? "Fruit Fly"? By Any Name, They're Bigger Than Ever

Get to know the girls who like boys who like boys

But do the gays even want her there? Many of them love their personal GBBs, but even with advances in the rights arena, a lot of them still crave recreational ghettos and moan "Ugh. A woman!" when one walks in. "That's perfectly within their rights," said Lizzie, ever understanding. "But I like the ambience. It has excitement, and it doesn't come off as smarmy and predatory as straight bars." No, not predatory at all. In fact, a woman will generally leave there chaste, not chased. But she'll float home on shoes that were praised by gays!

Read more Michael Musto at La Dolce Musto

"Fruit fly" Lauren Gould and her boys.
Jena Cumbo
"Fruit fly" Lauren Gould and her boys.

musto@villagevoice.com

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14 comments
pumbaaj
pumbaaj

Michael! I love love love your columns!  What do you think of the letter "A" being added to LGBT?   Are our GBBs exactly the same as gays?   Do we need to celebrate heterosexual love during pride month in order to be inclusive?   Gay teen support groups are becoming GSA's in the name of inclusion (and high school volunteer/charity/service points).  My own teen group is no longer a "gay safe place".  it's just another high school yearbook photo.

Laney Bizzle
Laney Bizzle

Point of views from women who: 1.) Are so phenomenally high maintenance and not fun to be around that no straight male would EVER want to talk to them without them putting out; and 2.) See gay men as nothing more than a stereotype custom-built to go shopping and gossip with them. (And no offense to Musto and the Village Voice, just some of the quote I read from the women interviewed made me wanna hurl)

jeannesmith
jeannesmith

Drag shows are the only thing I get out from under my rock for.

nycqgrrl
nycqgrrl

I'm a niche in a niche. Queer/Bi grrl engaged to the butch of my dreams but totally preferring hanging with the non bio grrls. I'll take Kylie and Britney over Ferron or Holly Near any day. Live for old school Paradise Garage and real non-disney non-ALW Broadway, and my butch and I love being the two woman among the 250 guys at Hedda's Chelsea Classics showing of "The Women" where we both can recite the lines!

lund519
lund519

Lusting for gay guys?  Doubt it.  Most of us can't even stand the sight of each other, opting to jerk off to pictures of 18-year-old straight jocks instead.  So who do gay men hang out with when they can't stand other gay men because of their piece-of-shit attitudes and rejection and 'I want to be the girl' personalities?  It'd be nice to find a female who can't stand gay men as much as me, even though I'm gay myself, but can't stand the stereotypical gay guys who are basically 7th grade girls in a gay body.  So I doubt very much that's anything that anyone, male or female is 'lusting' over.  I think that straight jocks still win that category and gay guys need to get over that delusion that our community is just overflowing with these kinds of guys - they ain't out there.  

SavannahMontgomery
SavannahMontgomery

There's another "sub-set" out there...the "wanna-be's" who use their gay friends to get into the hot clubs with their gay "ticket"...once in, they act like they are the be-all, loud and obnoxious and are going to "convert" or at least "prove" their va-jay-jays will rule the day...hence the "Ugh. A woman!" when one walks in."

But those are the "bad ones"...and that self-esteem thing...and you gays that bring her, don''t send her over to "interview" me either!  That girl "wingman" thingy seldom works.

jamie.sanford
jamie.sanford

I co-host the Fag & Hag Podcast with my BFF David. (Plug - fagandhagpodcast.com) We "dated" in high school (you can do the math on how that worked out), and have been best friends ever since. We are not friends because David is gay, we are friends because we enjoy each other's company and laugh at the same ridiculous things. Yes I am a fruit fly, but not because I pursued it.

williamHK
williamHK

These women have issues, I have to deal with fish all day at work, I don't want to socialize with them. 

rogienepomuceno
rogienepomuceno

Great coverage - of a subject that's familiar to a lot of people. If I may suggest a similar but far less discussed topic, how about the Guys (gay or straight) who like Women who like Women? One of my lesbian pals called me a Dutch boy - from enjoying the company of dykes - and I realized that there's a whole new world (and jargon) out there. What I also find strange is how lesbian couples immediately sense that I'm an ally (for want of a better word for now) and welcome me without hesitation. I just ascribe it to a sensitivity that women have in spades, more than men of any type. So - yes, lesbians and their male groupies, soon please!

jackson30
jackson30

Fag hags forever! This column was all so dead-on true.

bethesda
bethesda

I love the honest of these two women. I'm suddenly anxious to find my own personal GBB.

pumbaaj
pumbaaj

@nycqgrrl What the heck did you just say? I didn't understand a word of it!

pumbaaj
pumbaaj

@SavannahMontgomery Amen!!! They also enjoy c%ckbl^cking as well- if a guy hits on their gay friend, they may step between them and stop them.

SavannahMontgomery
SavannahMontgomery

Ok...I'm on a roll now...I know you can't help it, BUT...stop using your purse to "stake out" territory!  The bar..as in seats at the actual bar...space is limited, yet you, will find (or be offered) a seat and then blam! goes the purse, phone, gloves, hat, glasses, your "posse", whatever so that everyone else is now "squished" for being nice...and you wonder why you get eye-daggers.

 
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