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2003 Stories by George Smith

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  • Muscle Car 4 Sale

    published March 25, 2003

    In the mid '70s, I worked as assistant manager for a swimming pool where the boss would lend me his Dodge Superbee. The groundskeeper and I would... More >>

  • The War Wanker

    published March 25, 2003

    "Operation Iraqi Freedom" would not be complete without the combined power of war wankers. The wanker army, consisting of retired generals, TV... More >>

  • MOAB, Killer of the Helpless

    published March 18, 2003

    Exultation over the new MOAB—perhaps the ugliest and most stupid of new weapons in the U.S. armory—reveals a poverty of intellect and... More >>

  • Bombs Away

    published March 11, 2003

    Wartime should be a golden opportunity for heavy metal reinvigoration. Bad smallpox shots, Don Rumsfeld's patented press-briefing sneer, Spectre... More >>

  • Bugsplat

    published March 11, 2003

    Hundreds of jet sorties a day during the first week in March indicate the Pentagon is targeting just about everything in southern Iraq in advance... More >>

  • Press Corps

    published March 4, 2003

    War may be hell, but can a contrived boot camp prepare you for it? The media has answered the question with a "Yessir!"—acquiescing to... More >>

  • David Roter, 1947–2003

    published March 4, 2003

    David Roter, a solo artist and songwriter long associated with the Blue Öyster Cult and best known for penning "Joan Crawford" on the band's... More >>

  • Postcards From Hell

    published March 4, 2003

    Examination of leaflets air-dropped by the Pentagon's Central Command during February show much of the broad plan for war against Saddam Hussein.... More >>

  • Zak the California Sea Lion

    published February 25, 2003

    Eleven out of 10: TV news experts agree Saddam Hussein's seafaring forces ain't worth a pitcher of spit. But don't tell that to Zak, the U.S.... More >>

  • The Dirty, Dirty Bomb

    published February 18, 2003

    Buy duct tape and plastic sheeting. Stockpile food, get a pocket radio, hoard batteries, and find an easily sealed place in your apartment.... More >>

  • The Sonic Pain Stick

    published February 11, 2003

    New methods of American technical torture continue to roll off private-sector assembly lines in the effort to aid the war on terror. One of the... More >>

  • The Electromagnetic Pulse Bomb

    published February 4, 2003

    War fever drives the ebullient American media to wax enthusiastically on miraculous inventions that could lay waste to Iraq. And the most... More >>

  • The Electrocuting Water Cannon

    published January 28, 2003

    The innovative savvy of American electrical engineers always astounds. If something terrible can be built in the name of security, they never... More >>

  • More Than a Vegan

    published January 21, 2003

    Don't go for Boston's Corporate America thinking Tom Scholz has gone Chomsky-metal and decided to indulge in rock social criticism. The... More >>

  • The Russki Jammer

    published January 21, 2003

    With little of substance to report thanks to the secrecy fetish of the Bush administration, bored mainstream war journalists occasionally... More >>

  • Ride Hard, Die Hard

    published January 14, 2003

    Raw wrath and metal roll always win out. No matter how retro or staid, the best hard rock in 2002, by far, came from those who instinctively... More >>

  • Ricin, the Unproven Poison

    published January 14, 2003

    Let's test your war-on-terror IQ. What is said to be the nastiest poison in the hands of the Osama bin Laden brigade? Ricin. Now for the trick... More >>

  • The Soft Bomb

    published January 7, 2003

    In war, one of the first things the Pentagon likes to do is turn out the lights. Along with liberal use of high explosives, it now does the job... More >>

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