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1999 Stories by Guy Trebay

Archives: 2006 | 2005 | 2002 | 2000 | 1999 | 1998 | 1997
  • Knowledge Is Power Hair

    published December 28, 1999

    Last minutes of epoch. Time to clear slate, review past both immediate and distant, undertake important changes to herald next 1000 years. What to... More >>

  • The Harlem Shuffle

    published December 21, 1999

    If you don't know better, it's easy to swallow the hype about boom time in Harlem. There's all that stupendous real estate, for one thing... More >>

  • The Loophole Clause

    published December 14, 1999

    Santa Claus has five years clean and sober. He's also got an apartment, a new girlfriend, a VCR, and a job. He's most psyched about the VCR at the... More >>

  • Heroine Addiction

    published November 9, 1999

    The knock on drag is that it's the new mime, a woozy masquerade passing itself off as crisp commentary on the human condition. All is illusion,... More >>

  • Longer Harder Faster

    published October 26, 1999

    The party's in a semiconverted industrial loft in Dumbo, on the third floor of a former factory with scabbed plaster walls and thick pillars and... More >>

  • Every Step You Take

    published October 12, 1999

    He was the perfect romance-novel suitor. He called regularly. He sent flowers and almost daily notes. He remembered her birthday and seemed to... More >>

  • Man and Ape

    published October 5, 1999

    This image isn't of an artwork from "Sensation," the "controversial" Brooklyn Museum show, although it could be. The stooped and hairy mannequins,... More >>

  • Watching the Clothes Go Round

    published September 21, 1999

    When did fashion shows become such bad sex— an hour of excruciating tease culminating in 20 minutes of repetitious up-and-down? Whether... More >>

  • MTV: Behind the Music

    published September 14, 1999

    First of all I'd like to give a shout-out to God for letting me write this column. I also want to thank my mom, my dad, my grandma, my sisters and... More >>

  • Babes In Boyland

    published August 17, 1999

    It started with the clone. Crew cut, plaid flannel, faded button-fly Levi's with a sandpapered crotch. And let's not forget the unfortunate... More >>

  • Written on the Body

    published August 10, 1999

    There's a glyph for the breath of a dragon behind his right ear. His back is elaborately adorned with a dense Polynesian tattoo. His feet are... More >>

  • Breaking Camp

    published August 3, 1999

    Day camp used to be all about softball and lanyards. There was one good fistfight every summer, one heinous case of poison ivy contracted on a... More >>

  • Eyes Wide Shut

    published July 27, 1999

    If anyone needs another lesson about the relative value of human life in a celebrity culture, you don't have to look any further than a hill in... More >>

  • Search and Recovery

    published July 20, 1999

    10 A.M., Saturday, July 17, a telephone conversation. First man, son of former famous politician: "Are you up?" His friend, a... More >>

  • I Think Icon

    published July 13, 1999

    The most interesting photography exhibit that no one saw opened on Saturday and closed by Wednesday, its pictures all sold and carried off.... More >>

  • Look Who’s Talking

    published July 6, 1999

    The editor said write about talk. The writer wasn't tracking, okay, so sue him. He didn't realize the editor meant that Talk. Well, okay,... More >>

  • And the Bead Goes On

    published June 29, 1999

    In a letter urging a discouraged Ingrid Bergman not to give up on acting, the filmmaker Jean Renoir once wrote that "the cult of great ideas is... More >>

  • Rubbed the Wrong Way

    published June 22, 1999

    Back in the days before whores had Web sites, guys who wanted sex for money got a "massage." You wouldn't know it now, but there was a time when... More >>

  • The Razor Wire's Edge

    published June 15, 1999

    Johannesburg, South Africa— The rock never fell, although the locals said that it was bad luck and that one day it would. "The African... More >>

  • Dead Chic

    published May 25, 1999

    The Tibetan antelope, or chiru, may be nearing extinction. According to reports by environmental groups, the numbers of the high-altitude... More >>

  • India Ink

    published May 18, 1999

    A man refused a late-night drink at a tony hot spot pulls out a gun and fires it twice. The first bullet goes into the ceiling. The second kills... More >>

  • Queers in Space

    published May 11, 1999

    Feeling blah? Tired of Patriarchal Systems of Domination? Oppressive and Culturally Hegemonic imagery of dykes and queers as people with either... More >>

  • The Enemy Within

    published May 4, 1999

    They are hunted, harassed, forced to conceal parts of themselves that cannot always be hidden. They are hounded and criminalized not so much for... More >>

  • Getting Up

    published April 27, 1999

    DONDI's dead. He died last October at 37, still remembered by some as the reigning master of getting up, tagging, bombing, and representing with a... More >>

  • Seduction Theory

    published April 20, 1999

    Why does erotica always seem so unerotic? Is it because, as the philosopher (and C cup) Raquel Welch once noted on Johnny Carson, the mind is the... More >>

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