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Awards

2007 Stories by Michael Musto

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  • The Very Best "Best of '07" Round-Up!

    published December 25, 2007

    This year-end column will undoubtedly be remembered when all of next year's year-end columns come out. It will surely be called "the best,... More >>

  • I Am Legend Star: I Am Straight!

    published December 11, 2007

    Wynonna Judd had an 80-minute therapy session the other night, and since she billed it as a concert, I totally managed to be there to... More >>

  • Keira Knightley's Hot New Screen Lover

    published December 4, 2007

    Atonement is arty, sensuously done romance-novel stuff hinging on a girl's bitter distortion of the truth—a sort of multigenerational... More >>

  • Violence Is Golden

    published November 27, 2007

    The Oscar movies we're being treated to this year are so dark you can practically make truffles out of them. Fresh off surviving the Spanish... More >>

  • Freaks and Geeks

    published November 20, 2007

    I got my geek on at Mike Carbonaro's Big Apple Comic Book... More >>

  • Strike While the Irony's Hot

    published November 13, 2007

    All these strikes have cut down on my entertainment options—yes, it's all about me—but I've managed to make lemonade, just like on 9/11,... More >>

  • Oscar Winner Found at Gay Bar!

    published November 6, 2007

    Lizz Winstead has returned to standup! And she remembers how! "It's like getting back on a bike," says Lizz—who's playing Comix on the... More >>

  • Perez Hilton: "I Like Food, Not Drugs!"

    published October 30, 2007

    The mayor is openly gay! They've reduced police corruption! The restaurants don't serve attitude! And there are reasonably priced condos... More >>

  • Lance Bass on Pedophilia

    published October 23, 2007

    This week I'll be serving you up-to-the-minute trends, gossip, jokes, and maybe even a recipe for shit on a shingle. The latest trend in... More >>

  • Public Vulgarity and Claire Danes

    published October 16, 2007

    With stimulating nightlife at an all-time low thanks to all those pesky raids and regulations, one submits to the same old gay bars, sort of like... More >>

  • Apocalypse Musto

    published October 9, 2007

    On my last day in New York, I'd like to summon previously hidden powers of telekinesis to destroy everyone that's ever done me wrong, given... More >>

  • Dean Johnson's Legacy, Anna Nicole's Lunacy

    published October 2, 2007

    For the Bible Tells Me So, the documentary about the way religion craps on homosexuality, premiered at a church, but it was just the right... More >>

  • Owen Wilson Heals in Public

    published September 25, 2007

    A typically atypical week on the circuit involves a kebab competition, a play about postage stamps, a movie about a guy who blinks out his... More >>

  • Hillary and Condi and Dykes, Oh My!

    published September 18, 2007

    Let me be your MC for various A.C.-D.C. happenings down in D.C. First off, I recently wrote, only half sardonically, about More >>

  • Austen Powers: The Reruns

    published September 11, 2007

    The September movies may not be the December movies, but at least they're not the August movies. The flicks that come out around now generally... More >>

  • Read This In Loo of Sex

    published September 4, 2007

    Squirt.org spills all the juice about truck stops, adult bookstores, and other cum-dumping grounds... More >>

  • Who Put the Goth in Gotham?

    published August 21, 2007

    The Dark Shadows convention at the Marriott Westchester in Tarrytown brought out swarms of diehard goths, including an assortment of... More >>

  • Self-Service Nightlife

    published August 14, 2007

    Ever since they pulled the plug on my beloved Thursday nights at Arena, New York nightlife has rolled over and croaked like a diseased dog for... More >>

  • Frank and Open Discussions

    published August 7, 2007

    Death at a Funeral is a slight but amusing comedy of errors that builds to—spoiler alert—Peter Dinklage being bound and... More >>

  • Can You Top This?

    published July 31, 2007

    Having to come up with clever segues linking unconnected items every week has veritably sucked the life out of me while giving me a serious case... More >>

  • Fame Is Such a Drug. . . I Mean, Drag

    published July 24, 2007

    Having devoted my entire adult life to covering fame, I'd be lying if I didn't admit I want some more of the shit myself. Alas, thanks to a weird... More >>

  • Gilty Pleasures

    published July 17, 2007

    The LIZ TAYLOR of Mexico, Maria Felix had fabulous eye make- up, a fascination with cocks (and other barnyard animals), and an opulent... More >>

  • Follow the Bouncer Bald

    published July 10, 2007

    STEVE WILKOS swears he's a gentle father and a regular person who hasn't had a beastly fight in years. Gazing into his baby blues while... More >>

  • Room With a Spew

    published July 3, 2007

    Some unrelated short items for PARIS HILTON and anyone else with A.D.D. and an unread Bible: First off, Logo meets Lego with Rick &... More >>

  • Two Hot to Handle

    published June 26, 2007

    A witty, old-school leading man à la David Niven and Leslie Howard, Hugh Dancy has pranced into our lives just when I need him. The... More >>

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