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2008 Stories by Michael Musto

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  • Oscar Mania Strikes! Let's Regroup and Discuss

    published Feb 22, 2008

    I live for the gay Super Bowl known as the Oscars and always go against the popular waves of feeling in my reaction to everything on the telecast. When the media was crucifying Cher, Bjork, and Geen... More >>

  • The Importance of Being Ernest Borgnine

    published Feb 21, 2008

    Don't read this if you're under 92 years old: Ernest Borgnine has an autobiography coming out in August called, aptly enough, Ernie. Who the fuck is Ernest Borgnine? Well, to my bad movie club that ... More >>

  • How To Become a Nightclub Star!

    published Feb 21, 2008

    Bouncers are mere toys Or at least how to get in! First off, pay no attention to the losers lining up outside. They're just misbegotten window dressing and joining them would not further your cause ... More >>

  • The Huffington Post Interviews Me! About Screwing Up!

    published Feb 20, 2008

    Turning my fuckups into writeups has become my favorite accidental high, and the Huffington Post is the latest venue to deal me a fix. That site's Seema Kalia just interviewed me for her regular colum... More >>

  • Mo' Better Blind Items!

    published Feb 20, 2008

    My current column of salacious blind items is causing such an international sensation that people who can't figure out the answers are leaping off tall buildings without even having done their hair. W... More >>

  • In Praise of Clay Aiken

    published Feb 20, 2008

    The holy word has come back from the Claymates and it is thus: "Miss Musto, why don't you write something NICE already about our beloved god of the pasty face and the ambiguous voice? Why don't you ... More >>

  • A Heaping Pile of Salacious Blind Items!

    published February 19, 2008

    What are you hungry for, kids? A healthy serving of blind items with a drizzle of bilberry syrup and a side order of brown couscous? You want a... More >>

  • Is James Earl Jones' Big Daddy a Papi Chulo?

    published Feb 19, 2008

    Who do you want to see being all sexual and letchy, grabbing the ladies in between pawing his own crotch and shit? Seventy-seven year old James Earl Jones? Me too! Well, Brendan Lemon's culture-watc... More >>

  • The Blind Leading the Fabulous: Five Free Items for You

    published Feb 19, 2008

    Y'all have been so sweet to read my blog that I'd like to take you out for fluffernutter sandwiches with special sauce, but instead I'll just give you an exclusive VIP peak at some of the blind items ... More >>

  • Harvey Fierstein on the History of Blowjobs

    published February 5, 2008

    At the sumptuous J. Mendel show at the Plaza, I was lucky enough to sit next to Paper magazine's know-it-all, Mickey... More >>

  • A Gay Senate Candidate Revealed!

    published January 29, 2008

    The concert version of Jerry Springer the Opera at Carnegie Hall was much better than Bill O'Reilly the Ballet or Lipstick... More >>

  • Comedy Payola Scandal Resolved!

    published Feb 15, 2008

    Thanks to a certain local comedy group, my garbage pail has been strewn with mints, ties, gum, temporary tattoos, and liquid soap—all gifts they have sent me in little care packages every single wor... More >>

  • Ass-Baring Parties Conquer Nightlife!

    published January 22, 2008

    With gay nightlife in a transitional phase (i.e., it sucks), one grovels around looking for any small pleasures—you know, ennobling things... More >>

  • Terrence Howard's Latest Hustle and Flow

    published January 15, 2008

    A whole lot of black people are making Broadway alive again! First off, Passing Strange is "the moving and hilarious tale of a young black... More >>

  • Shrek Casting Gossip: Merrily We Troll Along

    published Feb 15, 2008

    Craig Bierko might very well play Shrek in the upcoming musical show based on the hit movie franchise, according to a poster on one of them there often-right Broadway boards. (If it's true, Bierko wil... More >>

  • Rejoice, East Village Gays! A Site for You!

    published Feb 14, 2008

    I hate promoting another site—in fact, I hate promoting ANYTHING—but I have to put a word in for eastvillageboys.com, which revels in all things pertaining to gay males from that particular geo... More >>

  • Dykes, Drunks, and Divas in Fabulous '60s Chick Flick!

    published Feb 13, 2008

    Sidney Lumet has always specialized in tough movies with brooding, hairy males, but he did do one flick about some lovely chick bonding—The Group, the 1966 melodrama based on Mary McCarthy’s nov... More >>

  • Culture Alert! Euan Morton in Concert!

    published Feb 13, 2008

    The delectable Euan Morton can deftly perform drag pop (he was Tony-nominated as Boy George in Taboo), French classics (he just appeared in supporting roles in Cyrano de Bergerac), and Shaw (he rece... More >>

  • Haute Couture Bearded Lady Andre J Makes It Big!

    published Feb 12, 2008

    Andre J is just another fashionista in a full beard and Marilyn Monroe wig. The fabulous oddball (an offshoot of Patriicia Field's world), he cannonballed into kooky prominence on the cover of Paris... More >>

  • Phallic Fallacies Imploded in Harvey Fierstein's New "Affair"!

    published Feb 12, 2008

    I caught up with theater legend Harvey Fierstein to talk about A Catered Affair, the imminent Broadway musical he wrote the book for, including a juicy part for himself as a sympathetic gay uncle. W... More >>

  • Posh Meets the Gays: Spice Spice Baby

    published Feb 11, 2008

    My third favorite Spice Girl, Victoria Beckham took the stage at Hiro Ballroom's weekly gay bash last night to further her omnipresence while wrapping up the lunatic surrealness of Fashion Week. "I ha... More >>

  • Forgive Me, Claymates, I Have Sinned!

    published Feb 11, 2008

    My last attack on Clay Aiken's devoted followers, the Claymates, started on a wrong note (like so many of his concerts do). Contrary to what I wrote, his fans' parents aren't of the generation that ... More >>

  • The Grammys' Award-Winning Moments

    published Feb 11, 2008

    Which of the perverse telecast's random pairings was the looniest—Alicia Keys and dead Sinatra, Alicia Keys and half-dead John Mayer, or Carrie Underwood and the refugees from Stomp? I'll call it ... More >>

  • Kathy Griffin Grins and Bears It!

    published Feb 08, 2008

    Kathy Griffin is no dumb piece of work. The kooky comic knows that her audience consists largely of screaming queens wearing glitter gloss—and some macho gays too! So she's giving an interview to ... More >>

  • Turkey Alert: Paris When She Fizzles

    published Feb 08, 2008

    Some would say Paris Hilton's best performance was telling Larry King that she's embraced the Bible instead of open bars, but Paris herself feels it's in the romantic comedy The Hottie and the Notti... More >>

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