Email Author Michael Musto

Awards

• 2012 - AAN AltWeekly Awards

  "Why I Hate Being Gay! 62 Reasons!"

• 2012 - AAN AltWeekly Awards

  "Help! Blandness Has Taken Over Our Culture!"

• 2012 - AAN AltWeekly Awards, published August 31, 2011

  "Fame Is Better Than Drugs And I Want To Mainline That Shit"

• 2011 - AAN AltWeekly Awards, published June 22, 2010

  "Kicked in the Groin at Every Glittery Turn"

• 2011 - AAN AltWeekly Awards, published August 18, 2010

  "Where's My Book?"

• 2011 - AAN AltWeekly Awards, published December 29, 2010

  "Year in Review"

More

2010 Stories by Michael Musto

• I Have 5,000 Friends on Facebook

  published Nov 01, 2010

  And three in real life! But the important thing is that on Facebook, I have achieved my goal of 5,000 pen pals, and now I don't have to be pestered all day by people begging for my confirmation anymo... More >>

• My Show Got a Nice Review

  published Oct 29, 2010

  As you know, I'm co-producing Perfect Harmony, the Andrew Grosso-directed comedy about teen a cappella singers, which is playing at the Acorn on 42nd Street. It's a wry, satirical look at high school... More >>

• Betty White Is Now a Comic Book!

  published Oct 29, 2010

  Is there anything this old broad can't dor The only surviving Golden Girl, 88-year-old Betty will be featured in the Female Force comic-book series available in late November, with a portion of the p... More >>

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  FEATURED STORY

  If It's President Palin in 2012, Will You Move to Canadar

  published Oct 29, 2010

  Tell me the truth: If the absolute worst-case scenario happens, all good sense is thrown to the tundra, and for some crazy reason Sarah Palin ends up in the White House in two years (and not just scr... More >>

• News About Streisand, Debbie Reynolds, and Holly Woodlawn

  published Oct 29, 2010

  A letter just came in from my writer friend Gary LeGault way out in LA LA Land: "Dear Michael: "I wanted to provide you with an update on the script I wrote for the Brolins, which you were so kind ... More >>

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  FEATURED STORY

  A Message to Those Who Are Hating on Logo's A List: New York

  published Oct 28, 2010

  You know, all the queers who are screaming that it's mindless, insubstantial, and downright offensive, adding that Logo should be addressing serious LGBT issues instead of pandering to the superficial... More >>

• My Cutest Outfit Evah!

  published Oct 28, 2010

  It was a fuzzy lesbian-ish sweater with adorable baby seals on it, which I took clubbing the other night. (Yes, I clubbed baby seals.) It was a perfect choice for Murray Hill's riotously funny Miss ... More >>

• People Who Talk to Their Dogs

  published Oct 28, 2010

  I've witnessed it on the street, and it's deeply disturbing. Yeah, I do talk to myself sometimes, but at least that's a person I'm talking to! But holding a conversation with a petr It's rather on... More >>

• Dionne Warwick Speaks Out in Defense of Her Cousin Whitney Houston

  published Oct 28, 2010

  In her new memoir, My Life, As I See It, singer Dionne Warwick says this about poor Whitney's plight: "She was tested when she married Bobby Brown, as we all know. "The marriage seemed to be worki... More >>

• Baby Under the Spell of the Holy Spirit...

  published Oct 28, 2010

  ...really feels the power of praise music. You have to watch this to disbelieve it. They're brainwashing them younger and younger these days.http://christiannightmares.tumblr.com/post/1407819496/b... More >>

• Let's Answer That Arkansas Hatemonger!

  published Oct 27, 2010

  You know, the idiotic Midland School Board member who wrote on Facebook that he wouldn't wear purple in memory of the teen gay suicides because, "The only way I wear it for them is if they all commi... More >>

• Countess LuAnn Meets Pee-wee Herman

  published Oct 27, 2010

  CLICK HERE for my zingy column in which offbeat celebs like Countess LuAnn de Lesseps and Pee Wee Herman come together in a big ball of glittery mayhem, and I emerge the wiser for it. *Find out Pee W... More >>

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  FEATURED STORY

  Exclusive Interview With Molly Equality Dykeman

  published Oct 27, 2010

  Molly Equality Dykeman is a butch security guard who writes poetry on the side. She also happens to be the creation of comic Andrea Alton, who's livened up many an event in several boroughs with th... More >>

• I Had Crabs in Acting School

  published Oct 27, 2010

  Way back when I was a recent college graduate, I actually took acting classes on a whim, going once a week to study with William Hickey at HB Studios in the Village. Hickey was the brilliant actor wh... More >>

• "We Don't Serve Diet Coke!"

  published Oct 27, 2010

  "In fact, we don't serve soda at all! We are a speakeasy. They didn't have that then!"I was actually told all that at a trendy boite the other night, and my jaw dropped so low it hit my three pairs ... More >>

• Boy Devastated When He Can't Sing "Single Ladies"

  published Oct 26, 2010

  This YouTube clip deserves singling out as a pre-school but new school freedom-of-expression classic. What happens:Three kids -- two girls and a boy -- start singing and boogie-ing along to "Single L... More >>

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  FEATURED STORY

  Charlie Sheen Is Way Too Old to Get Wasted

  published Oct 26, 2010

  Last night, while I was at a very civilized party at the Plaza for Driving Miss Daisy, Charlie Sheen was naked, inebriated, and in a rage in his trashed suite at the same hotel. According to the Post... More >>

• Here's My Newest Broadway Show Idea

  published Oct 26, 2010

  There's a Broadway musical on the boards called Bloody Bloody Andrew Jackson, which got pretty favorable reviews, rightr So I've got a great new idea: A show called Bloody Bloody Michael Jackson! A... More >>

• Countess LuAnn Meets Pee-wee Herman

  published October 27, 2010

  At Paper magazine's Nightlife Awards gala at Good Units, host Pee-wee Herman set the tone with his incredibly harsh words for... More >>

• Joel Schumacher Was Straight!

  published Oct 26, 2010

  For a day anyway. The genial director known for films like St. Elmo's Fire and The Lost Boys, did it with publicist/performer Cherry Vanilla back in the '70s, according to the latter's spicy new memo... More >>

• A Lesbian Dissed Me Big-Time

  published Oct 26, 2010

  I've been operating a little too much in the gay-male ghetto, so I ventured into the lesbian arena to judge Murray Hill's hilarious Miss Lez pageant the other night at the Knitting Factory, way out in... More >>

• "Freedom of Speech" Doesn't Factor Into the Juan Williams Firing

  published Oct 25, 2010

  As you know, Juan Williams was recently fired by NPR for saying (among other things) on Fox TV that he gets scared when he sees Muslims on a flight he's on. "But what about freedom of speechr" shout ... More >>

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  FEATURED STORY

  Tyler Perry Is Against Down-Low Gays!

  published Oct 25, 2010

  I haven't been invited to see Tyler Perry's new film, For Colored Girls, a melodramatic adaptation of a Pulitzer-winning stage work from the '70s about various victimized African-American women. But ... More >>

• Go Away, Celebrity!

  published Oct 25, 2010

  I don't wish any harm to celebrities -- normally -- but once in a while, I do pray they'd simply vanish into an early retirement, so we'd never have to deal with their bland, perky, tiresome antics (a... More >>

• Geraldine Page: The Female Brando (Almost)

  published Oct 25, 2010

  "If Geraldine Page's talent, invention, and daring were of Brando's caliber, then why is she barely remembered todayr"Why did major film roles dry up so quickly for Page, relegating her to offbeat sup... More >>