Email Author Tristan Taormino

2003 Stories by Tristan Taormino

• Naughty in N'awlins

  published December 30, 2003

  NEW ORLEANS—I've been to swingers' parties before but never to a full-scale swing convention. When I was invited to teach sex... More >>

• The Big Easy

  published December 16, 2003

  NEW ORLEANS—What makes a city sexy? I didn't know much about New Orleans before my boy and I traveled there in November for a... More >>

• Third Annual Sexy Gift Guide

  published December 2, 2003

  Queer Eye for the Straight Guy has taught us that buying things makes you feel better about yourself. Buying things for others should feel... More >>

• Matchmaking 2.0

  published November 18, 2003

  Rebbetzin Esther Jungreis has been a successful matchmaker for over 50 years. Her secret? She teaches free Torah classes at the Jewish center she... More >>

• Peek-a-Blog

  published November 4, 2003

  Someone steps into a confessional and anonymously whispers through a dark, cut-out screen to a figure unseen. "Bless me, Father, for I have . . .... More >>

• Kinkphobia Alert!

  published October 21, 2003

  The latest advertising campaign for Dove Promises bite-sized chocolates poses the question "What's your perfect relationship?" and features a list... More >>

• Playing Footsie

  published October 14, 2003

  Whenever my friend Morgan sees a woman he finds attractive, his eyes immediately head south. I mean way south, like below the ankle: He... More >>

• In Defense of Sluts

  published September 23, 2003

  Recently, an administrator at the women's center of a large Midwestern university inquired about bringing me to campus as a featured speaker.... More >>

• Me and My B's

  published September 9, 2003

  LOS ANGELES—I have a very intense relationship with my boobs. I'm not only very fond of my mammary glands, but I think I appreciate... More >>

• Pussy Licker

  published August 12, 2003

  Every pussy has a story. Mine can tell countless tales of wagging tongues and a few of mouth-induced ecstasy. Like the time I shaved her... More >>

• Cocksucker

  published July 15, 2003

  I've been talking about blowjobs a lot lately. During a recent meeting, a British television and movie producer asked me, "Why do you think... More >>

• The Homo Hypothesis

  published July 1, 2003

  The next time Jenna Jameson is bending her perfect ass over a table and you've got your hand on the remote, you may want to ask yourself, "How... More >>

• Triple-Dip Tips

  published June 17, 2003

  Last year, I was a guest on a Ricki Lake episode called "Strangers in Our Bed" that tackled, well, talked about, the topic of three-ways.... More >>

• Ladies' Night

  published June 3, 2003

  There is an old Saturday Night Live skit in which Patrick Swayze and the late Chris Farley play dancers battling it out for a spot on the... More >>

• Spankee Doodle Dandy

  published May 20, 2003

  I just celebrated my birthday, and in addition to thickly frosted cupcakes from Magnolia Bakery, I indulged in another delicious tradition: the... More >>

• The Queer Heterosexual

  published May 6, 2003

  I have known few homosexuals who did not practice their tendencies. Such people are sinning against God and will lead to the ultimate... More >>

• Buck Naked

  published April 22, 2003

  Buck is a hot, hunky, handsome man. He is shaved bald, with a mustache, muscles, tattoos, a big fat cock, and a CUNT. How many of you... More >>

• Enema Evangelist

  published April 8, 2003

  When I travel around the country teaching sex and BDSM workshops at various stores and events, people respond with inquisitiveness or enthusiasm.... More >>

• Dildo Delights

  published March 25, 2003

  Popping out of purple satin and peeking through sequined gowns, the breasts of female celebrities appeared a series of close-up shots in a recent... More >>

• Bottoms Up

  published March 11, 2003

  In a parallel universe somewhere, Adam Glasser is the man of my dreams; either that or we are twins separated at birth. Let's look at the facts:... More >>

• Frenchie Gets Fingered

  published February 25, 2003

  Will someone please let me know what is up the asses of network TV executives and so-called journalists? It's certainly not a vibrating butt plug,... More >>

• Bare Naked Lesbians

  published February 11, 2003

  You can't just walk into a strip club; you have to call ahead first. Well, at least I had to call Cityscape in Long Island City to make... More >>

• The Horndog Factor

  published January 14, 2003

  "New Yorkers' libidos are shrinking faster than their 401(k)s. . . . Whatever impression you may get to the contrary—sex among the married... More >>