Best Venue to Take Your Little Bro/Sis to His/Her First Punk Show (2008)


So your parents' last hurrah—suave seventh grader, mini-you—has taken to throwing up anarchy symbols on notebooks, and his Catholic-school teachers have begun politely slandering him as "cynical." Bizkit and Backstreet have taken a backseat to Atari Teenage Riot, but the kid's mostly spinning discs you haven't gotten around to selling yet. Enter Brownies for babies, every Sunday night. B-list bands, sure, but punk as fuck! Before the recital, teach 'im how to snort crystal while blasting Sex Pistols reckids. (Once there, try to exploit the aw-lookit-the-button-cute-boy interest of New York dolls your age.)


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