Best Inexpensive East Village Bar (2008)

9C

New York nightlife's all about tha Benjamins—not having any, in the case of yers truly. What to do? Head over to blessedly divey 9C, where a little scratch buys a lotta scotch, or bourbon, or tequila. Or even—they got professional bartenders—mixed drinks, which taste pretty darn good! You can juice the jukebox too, thanks to frequent buy-backs. Among the East Village usuals, you'll find "The Man With the Laughing Hand Is Dead"—world's best/worst drinking dirge, courtesy of the Melvins. Subject your fellow cheapskates to all 11 minutes.