Best party to get over silly gender issues at (2008)

Filthy party

So you're a sophisticated New York fag and you've seen it all, and will admit to having done at least half of it. One Friday night you find yourself at some cool bar like Nowhere on 14th Street, or Metropolitan in Williamsburg for Dario Speedwagon's Filthy party, lusting after a butch little bear whose cultivated swagger and redneck-inflected affect are really working. You like your guys stocky, cocky, and self-aware, and this dude is all that and more. Plus, he's got a great beard, some nice ink, and amazing skin. You make out for a while, then exchange numbers and make a date. He exits stage left and you're all gaga watching him saunter out the door when your best friend, a/k/a the Spoiler, slithers over and tells you that the stud you've been smooching is in fact a female. Now the line is rather blurred, but being the sexual sophisticate you are, you make that call and keep the date with your luscious new boy, or boi. Hot's hot, and even if the mechanics are a little confusing at first, you'll figure it out—adaptability and versatility being prime traits of good New Yorkers.


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