So, you meet on the Internet. You ask him to dinner and have a great chat about careers, family, and recent vacations. And you think to yourself, "He's pretty cool. I'd like to hang out some more." Wisely, you choose to hit up Abilene, a spacious bar where they have plenty of tables for two and plush couches to get cozy on after the daily $5 drink specials (a can of Genesee Cream Ale and a shot) kick in. The DJ for the evening puts on your favorite Pixies song. "I love this song!" you exclaim. He gives you a weird look: "Who's this?" Uh-oh. The good conversation has dried up. You nervously look up at the futuristic chandeliers made out of lightbulbs. "Isn't that cool?" you say. "I think it's tacky," he says. Now this is where going to Abilene really pays off. You excuse yourself and walk over to the shelves where they keep all the board games: Connect Four, Yahtzee, checkers, backgammon, chess, Battleship, Scrabble, and Monopoly. When you return with Battleship, he gets super into it and tells funny nautical jokes, and because when you were eight you dreamed of joining Long John Silver's pirate crew, this is a turn-on for you. Suddenly, it's 2010, the two of you are getting married at sea, and all you can think is: Thanks, Abilene.