Andy Warhol Was Wrong: 25 Things That Aren't More Exciting If You Wait for Them
This $26 Warhol spotted in the front window of 4th Avenue's Dryden Gallery ("gallery" = "place to get finished jigsaw puzzles framed")
- "The idea of waiting for something makes it more exciting--Andy Warhol"
With all due respect Mr. Andy "bananas B-A-N-A-N-A-S" Warhol, the idea of waiting for something does not always make it more exciting. Maybe Christmas morning or making whoopee or Heinz ketchup are more savory after delayed gratification, but many things are not enlivened by the process of waiting for them. Here're 25.
- The plumber
- A jury verdict
- An unemployment check
- Your first pair of dentures
- Your first pair of adult diapers
- Kanye West to take the stage at Bonnaroo
- Those douchebaggy waterfront highrises in Williamsburg to open
- A hostage crisis to begin
- Paternity test results
- A shark to let you go
- A Gaza Strip airstrike
- The paycut to take affect
- A producer's call from the Green Room at Jerry Springer
- The second Great Depression
- A misplaced prosthesis
- Your shitbag roommates to pay up
- Your lover's AIDS test results
- The death of a parent
- A government ban on caffeinated Sparks
- The levee to break
- The juice to run down Robert Plant's leg
- Led Zeppelin to reunite with the guy who replaced Scott Stapp in Creed instead of Robert Plant
- Chinese Democracy
- All City to return for good!
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