Brett Favre just the last bailout to fail New York City. Next star in East? Caroline Kennedy.
Well, just another bailout that didn't work. Brett Favre was supposed to save the New York Jets, which would have made the city's sports fans happy, though not as happy as those Wall Streeters in their stadium skyboxes.
But in the middle of a boom — the Jets were 8-3 and seemed a cinch for the NFL playoffs — Favre imploded and the team collapsed.
Hubris pays off. And then it doesn't.
Take it from me, America, you know you're headed for a major depression when even the usual distractions stop working.
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But as the late Albert Ellis used to say to us neurotics hurtling toward a great depression: Separate your irrational thoughts from your rational ones. It's not your fault, America, that the games that took your mind off real-world or self-induced worries no longer keep you from sliding into full-blown anhedonia.
Play the following Ellis tape, instead of the one currently in your brain:
As the blunt Ellis would have pointed out, "Fuck what other people think! Get rational about it! Get over it! Stop your whining! Work at it!" (And yes, he used such language, even at age 90, in his memorable Friday night cheapo public sessions on the Upper East Side.)
Speaking of depression and games: Greed — not the usual greed but the excessive type — did in the Jets the way excessive greed did in Wall Street. The Jets suddenly collapsed and their already-shaky hopes for the playoffs dissolved.
Both NYC teams in the NFL playoffs? No joy.
Who's the next candidate to save the city? Caroline Kennedy. Big news this weekend, at least according to the Daily News, which snagged an interview with the princess. Ooooh, a scoop.
True, she wouldn't be beholden to her strong supporter Mayor Mike Bloomberg. The story?:
True, she's not part of the system. In fact, she's a dilettante who would be getting a high office solely because of her name.
Further proof that Caroline Kennedy is telling the truth when she says she "isn't, you know, part of the system": As the Daily News reported December 19, she doesn't even vote:
JFK's legacy? Caroline is a legacy, the way a rich, disinterested playboy like George W. Bush got into Yale not on his own merits but because his politician daddy, George H.W. Bush, went to Yale and Junior was what the school considered a "legacy."
And people like the Bushes are opposed to affirmative action? What do think the collegiate system of "legacies" is? It's affirmative action for rich white people.
Here's a real legacy: After thousands of years of fighting over land, the death dance between Arabs and Jews has come to what media outlets are calling the "bloodiest hit" by Israel in 60 years: "HELL FIRE RAINS ON GAZA."
At least you're just fighting for your job, not your survival. You think things are bad? Think about those little girls in Kurdistan who are being routinely circumcised.
That's an old story in much of the world. More bad news that's more immediate ...
NO PARTICULAR ORDER:
Register (U.K.): 'Walmart's Jesus Phone no better, no worse: Save two bucks!'
N.Y. Post: 'Dump 'em: Losers Mangini, Favre must go'
The Age (Australia): 'More children reported dead in latest Gaza strikes'
N.Y. Daily News: '15-year-old girl arrested in brutal Bronx stabbing'
N.Y. Post: 'HAMAS-CIDE: ISRAEL SET FOR GROUND RAID'
N.Y. Times: 'Suicide Bombs Kill 20 in Afghanistan'
Washington Post: 'Blagojevich on the Way Out, Says Illinois' No. 2'
Wall Street Journal: 'Latin American Investors Quiet on Madoff Losses'
Register (U.K.): '101 uses for a former merchant banker'
Wall Street Journal: 'The Weekend That Wall Street Died'
N.Y. Times: 'Romance and Recovery in Quake-Devastated Area'
Washington Post: 'An Experiment in Mastering Risk'
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